to the people who think that a girl must not have actually been sexually assaulted 'because if she had, she would of ____" are part of the reason why there is no justice and now everyone thinks that all guys are victims of false accusation claims. yes, there are some false accusations, I won't pretend it doesn't happen. but you don't know what kind of emotional trauma sexual assault can produce, you don't know how you would react until it happens. sure before it happened to me I used to think 'why wouldn't they have reported it right away?' 'why not get a rape kit' 'there's no way someone who was sexually assaulted who would still be around their aggressor after it happened'. but these are just not true. the truth, is that everyone reacts and feels differently about the situation, everyone's aggressor meant something different to them. in my case it was someone I cared about and was very close to. sometimes I think it would of been easier to report if it had been a stranger, but realistically there are so many women who don't report those either, so maybe not. now in my case, i'm still friends with the guy who did it... yes I see him on a regular basis and we still hangout. sounds like i'm making it up now doesn't it? I know what it looks like and that's a huge reason why I can never report it. him and his gf at the time when it happened, made me feel as if it never happened, that I made it all up. and yet I know it happened, because it wasn't just once. and I also know he used to rape his gf as well, but they were dating it isn't rape, right? she stayed with him for almost 2 years and if I had to guess probably got sexually assaulted at least 50 times. because she never said no. because she would be half asleep or drunk and she couldn't. is that a normal response? to stay with someone for so long. then when it happens to another girl, you still take his side and make her feel worthless? no, not really. to a court that would look like BS. but when u care about someone, when they manipulate you into thinking he did nothing wrong and no one would believe you. you do some weird stuff. so don't judge someone because u may never know what really happened, only they do and their potential aggressor. that's why rape and sexual assault is so hard to convict. because it's intimate, often no witnesses. it's all he said she said unless a rape kit is performed within the time frame. but unless there are sure signs of force or semen, it won't work and with certain sexual assaults, force isnt always obvious. nor do all aggressors ejaculate. so as I said. you may never know what happened, so just cuz it sounds unreal, doesn't mean it is
Lately I sweat a lot at night and it's really weird because I have never sweat that much at night, except for maybe during extra hot summer nights. And I haven't changed anything. I use the same blankets I've always used, I've already tried sleeping naked, with windows open. But I sweat so much that I sometimes wake up and feel like someone spilled a drink over me in the middle of the night. It really sucks because I'm not used to showering in the morning, I usually do it in the evening and it's fine. It doesn't fit into my routine, I hate the cold in the morning and since everyone in the house has to get up at the same time, it makes my flat mates mad when I spend too much time in the bathroom. But first and foremost I'm worried that something is wrong with my body or something.
I got three Whisper app and within 15 minutes a 23 year old guy asked me to do that stuff with him. I ended up sending him pics and eventually blocked him. This happened within 6 hours. I'm 16. He said it would be our little secret, but I'm too scared to lose my virginity and so I blocked him.
This may sound like a joke but please know I'm being completely honest here and just need help. My sister has incestual feelings for me. she's twelve years old and I just turned seventeen. I don't know if this a phase she's going through, or if she's just trying to get a reaction from me, but I've been feeling really bad. She constantly turns whatever conversation we're having into something inappropriate. She asks me if I can kiss her on the mouth so she knows what it feels like. She asks if I want to see her undressed. A week or so ago she came into my room and molested me in my sleep. And when I woke up, she kissed me on the mouth and I was just frozen and didn't know what to do. I've been avoiding her, and quite frankly I am afraid of her. I've told her several times that brothers and sisters can't do that, but she said she read a book about a brother and sister who did these things together, so she thinks it's fine. I don't know who gave her the book. I'm actually crying now because I just feel so sick and I don't know what to do. Our parents are dead and we live with our grandmother, and when I told her about my sister, she laughed. I don't know how to fix this.
My anxiety goes through the roof when teenage boys are nearby. No, not because I want to impress them or anything. It's just that in my experience, they're the worst people on earth. As a group. Not as individuals. But I can't even count the amount of times I have been harassed, insulted, made fun of by groups of teenage guys. Sometimes more, sometimes less severe. But for someone with anxiety, even the less severe statements and words hurt like hell. It makes me so nervous that I sometimes even get a small panic attack after walking past a group. And I avoid it. Sometimes at school, when I have a lesson to skip, I spend the entire 45 or 90 minutes in the bathroom because the places we have for breaks are occupied by said groups.
When I'm reading a book or other type of long text, I do it aloud whenever I'm alone at home. This helps me focus since my attention span isn't great. With foreign language texts this also helps my pronunciation.
One of my family's cats tends to snort really loud whenever she's annoyed. Kind of funny because it's such a human-like behavior.
I want to give any female my Facebook password. I want someone to evaluate me
I cried in church some weeks ago.. not my proudest moment..
i am tired of understanding the fact that we living being has emotion. the way it works is full of paradox and irony, both positive and negative, and I am tired of always be the one to understand it most.