For years now, I've felt that I didn't want to live. I didn't mean that as "I want to kill myself". Actually, that's a lie. I have seriously considered that. But for now, I don't. Life just doesn't interest me. I can't be bothered. If I were to die, that would be fine by me. I have nothing I want to do. The only reason I'm still here is because I would hurt people if I weren't. I wonder if I'll ever know what it's like to enjoy living, to actually want to live. To have things I want to do, to look forward to. And I wonder if something is wrong with me because I don't. I've tried to enjoy life, but it seems like I can't.