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Hey all, gonna apologize in advance about my long posts, it's because I treat this like a journal , except I have an audience which is kinda cool lol. Im writing here again because I feel like the more I write about it, the quicker I may be able to get it out of my system. So as much as I feel foolish to be upset that some internet fling stopped talking to me after 2 1/2 weeks of talking , I can't sit here and lie that it's not affecting me, cuz it is. The funny thing about it is that just a day before I found out he blocked me out of nowhere , I couldn't stop thinking about him and I had realized that i was getting a little obsessive , like I always do, unfortunately. Our last convo, he had vented to me about his job, and it meant a lot cuz I felt like he was feeling comfortable with me. It makes no sense why he blocked me .. The last thing I ever said to him was "how was work ?" .. Which I thought was thoughtful on my part.. But instead I get blocked. Obviously , I dont know the real reason why he blocked me--could've been because of his significant other , or he's a real fucking dickhead.. I don't know, but I'm upset and I can't comprehend why he would BLOCK me right when we're getting to know each other. I keep blaming myself thinking maybe I did something wrong but I know for a fact I didn't. I was kind and caring, not too annoying. He didn't show signs of being annoyed with me cuz like I said , our last convo he opened up to me. But then again this brings up a very important topic in my life -- Why do I get so obsessive with people? Why am I addicted to the lust phase? It's like a serious addiction that I can't get away from. If he were to talk to me again, I would be happy and that's a problem . I should be able to cut him out , but the truth is I don't want to, especially cuz we were just starting to talk and he took away all the bullcrap I'm dealing with in my life. But all that ain't worth it if the person is just gonna cut me out with no warning and especially after I'm at the peak of my obsession. That's a cruel joke the universe played on someone as vulnerable as me. Or maybe I need to end this vicious cycle once for all. I'll be honest, it's so much easier said than done, cuz I know damn well if an attractive guy who has a kind personality starts talking to me and he's into Astrology?!? It's gonna take the ultimate will power not to start talking to them. Not like I have intentions of meeting them or anything , but it's nice to have an escape from the harsh realities of the real world, and it's a whole lot better than drugs. But drug addiction is more curable , this isn't because , well , what's the harm in craving human contact? You don't think you're doing anything wrong by talking to someone over the Internet and just letting it all out. But then with people like me, who have mommy and daddy issues, I get obsessive and I end up only hurting myself , because ladies you know how men are, especially the attractive ones -- they have the attention span of a fly. If they don't eventually get to be intimate some how, they lose interest. But I don't think this was the case with this guy and funny thing is-- I thought he was going to get obsessive .. That maybe it would end badly but instead, he fucking blocks me Lmao. I have a strong feeling it has to do with his significant other but it is what it is. I can't do anything about it and I can't assume the best and give this dude the benefit of the doubt cuz there's still the possibility that he's just an asshole and didn't wanna talk to me anymore. In that case , I already have a Facebook page waiting to torment him. Not torment him directly , but we're part of the same Astro community and he's gonna feel my wrath , cuz lo and behold I do this shit to him, a freaking Scorpio , forget about it. Fuck that. Nobody fucks with an Aqua. Nobody ;)

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