I think I've lived a good life. Regardless of the ups and downs, I feel like I'm content with where I'm at now and I think this is the perfect ending to my story. I know it's selfish and cowardly and I still have "so much to live for" but I don't want to know what the future may hold. I don't want to know if tomorrow will be worse than today or better. I don't want to continue on like this. I plan on killing myself tonight.