I'm an over-intelligent, under achieving lazy son of a bi*ch 24yr old male. My parents never married and I barely know my biological father...When I was a teenager (and well before that) my stepfather treated me very violently and I began acting out in the hope that I would be sent away. -I was! Now that I've been forced to return (due to medical circumstances) I feel that there is a huge rift between my parents and I and my entire family seems disconnected from me (although they don't seem tom notice much) and I hardly ever talk to them. It's been making me increasingly more and more depressed and I feel lost and lonely despite having a loving, supportive girlfriend with a great family. I feel like trash, a disposable throw away with not future and no will. -Should I have just taken the abuse? Perhaps I'd still have proper family ties right now...Maybe he was right! Maybe I needed to be beaten, perhaps then I wouldn't be a worthless washout. I smoke and drink recklessly and don't really care if I get cancer, life's not really that great and the nothingness of death would be a welcome reprieve.