I've been trying to come up with ways to make my boyfriend break up with me so I don't have to feel bad about ending things.
That's extremely unhealthy. If you really cared about that guy at one point or other, and he's done nothing seriously wrong to change that then you need to have to the decency to end things with him. Honestly, sounds like you're not mature enough for a relationship if you can't make the tough calls.
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