For years, my family has annoyed me with studies (I understand the fact that all parent want a great future for their child) but my youth was depressing because I had no friend, I was forbidden to complain about anything because I was in a good family that could offer most of the thing I wanted and I never got sastifaction of my succes. i just go my 25th birthday, the last time i hold someone in my arm was 13 years ago, I never had a girlfriend because I'm too introvert to accept my own feeling, all my friends say that I'm too cold, too stoïc, a bit frightening (I'm not really a model) even if I'm the most optimistic person they know. The worst is that even if I want to be in couple, I am afraid that my girlfriend (let"s hope) want a child ..... and I really don't want a child because anything or anyone that remind me about school or study either give me panic attack or either anger me. And because I couldn't complain in my youth, I never (verbally) fight with people preferring to say yes or nothing. The last thing, is, because i can't accept my feeling, i don't even know if I'm in love with someone. And still, I keep hapiness in my hearth because I take time to speak to imaginary or virtual people and I feel more sastification by finishing a game (of any sort) or reading a good book or watching a good movie.