the guy i want to sleep with aside from my boyfriend is very attractive. i met him whilst i was still with my current. hes exactly what i look for in a boyfriend but i would not get in a relationship with him despite hes exactly what i want and think i need cos i dont feel i know him well enough to know if he would want a serious and long term towards marriage relationship im looking for, even though he has asked me to become his girlfriend several times. i stay with my current cos hes safe and refers to me as his future wife. i feel like it would take too long to get the new guy up to speed so that he starts refering to me as his future wife also. i just feel like i met this new guy at the wrong time in my life. i feel like in another life we could have been. on the other hand i am scared of a situation in which i married my current and always had these cheating thoughts at the back of my mind. its not the first time a new guy has come in and ive had these thoughts for whilst with my current. i just wish my current made the changes i hinted then asked which im afraid will soon become nagging to make me attracted to him, not just physically but mentally too. he says hes in control of the relationship but secretly he makes me feel like im his mum whos constantly asking him to better himself. i dont know what to do i do love my current but he needs to make this little boy changes if he wants a big serious girl like me like he says he does. i dont know if thats enough grounds to leave him on. weve been together several years now. help?