I left a bunch of college books at my parents house, had to leave the dorm and drive 30 minutes to the house. I brought my girlfriend it was the first time she had been to my mom and dad's. When we got there the lights were off so I figured they were sleeping but never fear! I have my key. I unlocked the back door trying to be quiet because my dad has had high blood pressure so I wanted everyone to be able to rest. I made it in the back yard and headed to the living room to get my books before I could turn into the room I hear my dad grunting... it happened all so fast, I was turning to leave then I heard my mom, my dear sweet Martha Stewart of a mother scream "Oh fuck me, Jason" part of me died that day. I got back in my car practically out of breath with no books to show for it. My girlfriend who waited in the car asked why and I just didn't answer. I haven't said anything to her yet and that happened 2 days ago. But I'll be dammed if my mom just didn't call me and and invite both of us to dinner tonight. According to mom, dad is feeling much better.