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I was always the normal one. Everyone said so. "You're so lucky, you're the normal one". Being raised by a druggy that went to prison for child rape while my mother chased bands, my elder sister was bipolar and had PTSD, my little brother is autistic. My sister had her mental break at 21 and now has schizophrenia. My little brother is in his senior year of high school and about to be held back for the third time. I'm married with three kids now, she's in and out of mental institutions, he's working on his IEP to go to an alternative school next year. I've been very depressed lately. Constantly fighting with my husband, no sex drive, can't sleep, yelling at my kids, panic attacks when I go in public, too tired to do anything, I just haven't been myself. I thought it was postpartum depression, third child isn't quite three months old, so I went to a psychologist. PTSD, Manic Depression(bipolar), and Severe Panic Disorder. The normal one? Funny. I'm so scared. I remember my sister's bipolar problems. I don't want my babies around that. And bipolar doesn't just go away. Drugs and counseling sure did my sister a lot of good. She's completely lost her mind now. I really hate this world so much. First you give three children to a child molester and leave them there until he goes to prison for raping a good, then you take my amazing baby brother and let some stupid children seriously hurt him repeatedly because he's different, then you take my genius sister's sanity, and then my last happiness? FUCK THIS WORLD! I'M NOT LOSING THIS FUCKING TIME! I'M BEATING THIS! FOR MY BABIES, FOR MY HUSBAND, AND FOR MYSELF! Sorry, TMI for Facebook but had to get it off my chest.

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  • I have Borderline Personality Disorder, and grew up with a schizophrenic mother and physically abusive father. I work full time, and have three children and a husband. It is hard sometimes, but you CAN do it. I'm currently not medicated because my prescription cost too much even after insurance, but with a lot of self monitoring, I am able to maintain some semblance of normalcy. Don't give up, and always remember, there's a reason emergency manuals for airplanes tell you to put your O2 mask on before your kids'. Take care of you, so that you can take care of your family better.

  • I have a friend with a bipolar disorder, and it sounds like she went through similar stuff as you did. And she's great. Yes, she has to take medication and of course she has some bad days, but although she's schizophrenic and bipolar and has PTSD also, she always seemed perfectly normal to me. When she told me the first time, I was so surprised. So don't worry. You can win. You can live normally, although I guess you'll have to make more effort to do so than the average person. I'm sorry this happened to you. And I wish you all the luck in the world, and lots of strength. I believe in you.

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