I just want to sleep, that's it. I'm desperate. My anxious thoughts are keeping my head racing, and my eyes ever wandering in the darkness of my room. I don't know what I'm looking for, or why. I sit here not lying next to the man I love, as we fear for my health issues. I'm waiting on my blood tests, but that's all I ever seem to be doing these days- waiting. waiting. waiting some more, I don't want to be in limbo any longer. Just tell me that I'm sick and get it over with, I can't keep my drowsy head up much longer, i just want to know that I'm sick so that I at least have something solid, something steady and constant in my life, I don't even care that I have to be on medication for the next 35 years, I just want peace and relief...I'm just so tired, so very, very tired..