My mum is so controlling of my life that I can't separate her thoughts or mine apart. She chose my options, my a levels, my uni and made me break with my bf.
I see this and think that either you did not show that you were willing to choose anything for yourself, or you never learned to say "no".
don't listen to any of these people. I know what you're trying to articulate. your mother does not have proper boundaries. any time someone says I can't tell their thoughts from mine, you're being controlled. You need to enforce your boundaries... if you do not want her to make choices in your romantic relatonships... stop telling her every detail. people who can't control their own lives often find it easy to control others.
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