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My eldest brother tried to legitimately kill me once while I was staying with him briefly... He had shot an obscene amount of meth, turned paranoid, and twisted reality til he was convinced that I had been screwing his girlfriend, who lived down the road. So while I was asleep, he crept into my room with a bat, and luckily stepped on a creaky floorboard loud enough to wake me, in just enough time to roll and dodge the bat coming down. In the fight that followed, he punched me in the throat, and I wound up sticking a pocket knife into his thigh. After the cops showed, I took off with a pillowcase filled with clothes, and haven't talked to him since. He STILL thinks we were screwing behind his back.

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