I've had two girlfriends. My first is still in love with me from a relationship 24 years ago. I don't understand why either. I have made it clear that I am an ice cube emotionally and do not ever want another relationship. I am dangerous and dangerous to associate with. Do I have a degree of care about her? Yes, but is it worth the risk she'd be taking? No. I wish she'd look past the obvious and understand that I am not 15 anymore. Many things have changed during that time and the awful part is that some secrets must go to the grave , so she may never fully understand that I push her away because I care.. even if it is only a little.