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Few years ago the guy who was like my best friend told me that he was in love with me and he wanted to be more than friends... I was very surprised but thinking of that thing that says "love the one that loves you" (or something like that) I said yes to him. Few days after we were trying to date he started to give me "advises" about what i should wear, how should i use my hair and he always talked about all the thing that were wrong with me. I just sent him away, and in the moment i didn't notice how much harm he caused telling me those things.... After 4 years, somehow it stills hurting a lot, and even i dont want to say it out loud that made me insecure about my self..

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  • Constructive criticism is always good, no one likes to see wrong in themselves. Maybe he just wanted the best for you and was pushing you to reach your full potential.

  • It takes multiple good comments to heal the damage of one negative comment (just want you to know, you are normal). The wonderful thing about it though is that it even works if the good comments come from you. Choose something about yourself that you are feeling insecure about, your hair for instance, look at it, think about it. Write down things you like about it. The color, texture, do you like the way it lays in a certain place. If there are things you don't like, decide if YOU really don't like them, or if you don't like them because of what he said. If you really don't like them, decide what you can do to change that, if you think it is just because of him, decide for yourself about how you feel about it, and write it down. Next time you feel bad, read what you wrote. You can retrain your brain to think more positively. Talk to a good friend about how you feel, telling someone close to you will help you feel better, and they will know you need to hear good things, so they will be more likely to tell you the positive things they think about you.

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