I am straight and married but I have had sex with a few men over the years (not since I got married) I still fantasise about giving BJ's I always enjoyed doing that and kinda miss it. My first gay experience was with a mate called Tom we were both about 13 when it started and we did it for about 3 years. We met regularly and would go to the local woods to fool around. He was the "top" and I would pretty much always be the one on my knees swallowing his cum. I moved away and didn't do anything with a guy for about 2 or 3 years. My next time was with a guy called Craig. We worked together and a few of us went out for a drink at the end of our shift. It was my last day and it ended up being just the two of us. We ended up in a cheap hotel room and he fucked me... It was amazing. He was gentle and understanding. We sucked each other and kissed. He had lots of lube with him and when he took my anal cherry he took his time and after a short while his cock was sliding in and out with ease. He came inside me (a feelung I loved) and then we showered together. I sucked him some more and he gave me the best blowjob I have ever had. When I came my whole body was shaking. We went to sleep and in the morning I gave him another BJ and we went our separate ways. I ended up being a bit confused about my sexuality after that and never called him again. I sometimes think that if I had called him I would probably be a gay man now. Another 2-3 years later and I met a guy in a bar. Not much to say about him. I was drunk. I don't know his name and he came pretty quickly when I sucked him and was pretty bad at giving BJ's too. I just can't stop thinking about sucking a guy off or meeting someone like Craig again. I love my wife and will never cheat on her but I have been watching gay porn and imagining that it is me with the cock in my mouth or ass. I have tried to suggest a strap-on to my wife but she did not seem that keen at all. I guess I will just have to keep it all in my head for now. Maybe in the future my wife will use a dildo on me and I can suck that instead. I can only hope... Please leave any thoughts in the comments. I really could do with a response. I could do with knowing if there is anyone else out there who is facing the same issues.