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I made up an ex boyfriend because I was ashamed that I never had one and never kissed or made out with somebody while my friends were all fucking through world's history. I do not regret this lie and I had the most beautiful first kiss with the most amazing boyfriend. But with the kisses it's the same as with the sex- I feel like I need more experience to be able to say that our sex (or kisses) is good. I regret not to have kissed and hooked up with more guys while I was still free. Sometimes I think I need to break up just to get that experience. I don't, because I feel like nobody would want me and besides I can't leave somebody I love.

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