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I am so desperate of finding a girlfriend or a fuck buddy that I've tried everywhere looking for it. dating sites, clubs and even fucking craigslist. i live in the philippines, 22 male and fair looking guy. the things about me is that i fall in love for the most good looking people in every group of women I meet that tend to ignore the other girls around her who likes me. And by the time I notice it, its already too late. My dad died when i was 8 so my mom raised me and my 2 older sisters. the 2 of them were netted by the life insurance my dad had but i didn't qualify because i was too young that's why until not my 2 sisters think of me as a good for nothing dead weight. Even before I started my rebelious phase they already started hating me and making me look like the enemy in the family to the point where they do the worst things inside the house and will be able to get away with it because they can just blame it on me and my mom will not question it because she also thinks the same thing. i grew with my mom trying to be a dad too much that it seemed like i never really had a mom. its like she was the one who died not my dad. here i am surrounded by women in my house taking up tourism management surrounded by women. And the only thing I want from life is 1 girl who will love me because I know I will love her very much that sometimes Im too scared to look out of fear not being able to be good enough for her. I've been surrounded by women my whole life but I haven't a woman to truly love me. I sometimes think and wish that when im at my happiest i just get shot in the head or struck by lightning so that that will be the last thing that will be in my mind because i am scared of returning into my blackhole of a depression that i have. i have shit for friends, joined a frat in college but none of the brothers i am truly connected with. I feel so alone.. i am surrounded by a lot of people because i am friendly outside but i am so alone in the inside.. if you're out there, the girl that i've been asking god my whole life. please save me... . lets save each other

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