I've been raped 3 times by my boyfriend...the last time he did it,it was intentional to hurt me...and hw didn't care and the sad thing is through all that,I thought he loved me...I just wanna die...
till this day I regret not reporting it, because I think about the next girl he's gonna violate and how I could have prevented it. at least go to a rape crisis center sweetie I know the statistics of rapist not going to jail and how the legal system fails rape victims.
It's called trauma bonding when u keep going back to the person who keeps hurting you. kinda like stalkhome syndrome , your only gonna go down a road of drug abuse and doing things you'll regret trust me I've been there get free counseling or therapy. I know exactly how u feel the only way your gonna feel okay again is helping yourself easier said then done but trust me on this I've lived it.
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