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so last night i told him i wanted oral sex too. and i wanted to make it a discussion as to why he doesnt give head. i asked so many questions and all his answers were vague. so i started assuming maybe its me. maybe its my shaving cream? do i smell down there? is it scary looking to him. because dicks scare me too but hes my lover so i could care less what that thing looks like. im makimg love to my man, rigght? so yeah he ended up expressing to me that giving head is not his 'thing' and that he didnt think it was a 'big deal' if he gave me head as well..... its not even about sex anymore it became about selfishness. and honestly i wish i had asked this question sooner rather just waiting around for him to please me in every way that i wish to be pleased. i really wish we had more clarity and that he was more vocal about his opinions in this relationship. because honestly guys i do all the fucking work in teying to make us become ONE unit. not 2 halves. but a whole. ive tried to make us communicate openly honestly expressing our feelings one to another. but honeslty this dude is a bric wall. half the time i feel as if i am talking to my self. and last night instead of initially having a conversation with me. he allowed me to assume that the problem was me. that he didnt do it because of me. i had to pry answerrsss out of his fucking brain. Nd finally after about a hour and a half of getting nowhere but with me just getting more and more sad and upset tht i was the only one trying to have a conversation i realized. Im twentyfuckingtwo i do not need this shit. im not married to him we have no kids and quite frankly i dont want to be bound to someone i cant even communicate with openly about sexual matters. in that moment i realized he was not worth fighting for. but i was. so im moving out. need some time to think about me.

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  • DTMFA (Dump the Mother Fucker Already)

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