My mother a huge sickness of bipolar and schizophrenia. She can never get her shit together because of her illness's. I haven't had a normal child or teen hood. I'm a current 17 year old girl. Who is housed in a very religious foster home, with very nice people who have a big close family. I am very scared, independent, shy, skeptical on trust, push everyone who loves me away, and always want to be alone. I really think they don't understand how I am, even though I've been with them for almost over a year. Half the time I just want to run away and start my own life, because I am a few short months away from eighteen and the court people would be too lazy to give a crap. I really don't know what I'm doing with my life. Every moment of every day, I constantly wonder why God gave me a very broken life and then sometimes question if God is even real. That's my confession.