I am a gay guy SO messed up that now i am trying to get girls because I HATE the fucking smell of shit that rises in anal sex. I want to fuck something and not be disgusted by myself. But could i fuck a woman? Am i trapped in this hell? Is this (being gay) my fault because some sort of repetition of this behavior? I cannot perfom sex with another man anymore buy i only orgasm with gay porn. IDK what to do, really. God, please, just f kill me.