Take it off your chest...
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Actually, this isn't kind of a confession... It's more like a story because my life story is really messed up and I really need to let it out because if I tell this to anybody who knows me, I think they'll see me with other eyes. My mother started living with my father at the age of 28 and nearly after that she realized he was drug addict and that he was abusive, but she liked him too much to run away from him. When they decided to have me, my mom still thought that he could change and have a different style of life. However, in the first two years after I was born they really struggled because my dad would spend all his money on drugs and booze. When I was 1 and a half, she found out that she was pregnant of my two younger twin sisters. My dad simply said to abort them. My mom denied it and said she would fight with all her might for all of us. My dad said nothing more and so my sisters were born. When i was 5, my father made me join the same sport as his and asked me if I had liked it. As young as I was, I had thought it fun at the time and decided to continue. Then it all got harder. Because I was a child, I would often get distracted and got scolds from the teacher very often. My dad didn't like it and said I was no good and started hitting me too. At first, my mom would get in the way but she would also get hurt and get hit by him. Then all went down hill really bad. I started to have bruises really easily so I wouldn't go as often to my grandmother's house and for some time my dad even prohibited it. When my sisters reached the age of 5, they also joined the same sport with me, but because my dad was so against them from the start he never gave them as much attention as he gave me, although he would also beat them up for also getting distracted. I didn't realize this was such a bad environment till I was 14 because no one would talk about this stuff at school and I wasn't allowed to sleepovers. When I started to realize how twisted my family was I began to rebel myself and out of spite and my own foolishness I lost my virginity to my father's favourite student. I got really hurt in the end because all he wanted was sex and he went to another city without ever telling me goodbye. At that point, I started to really focus on school and always got the best grades. I always had a passion for animals so at the time I had decided to go to veterinarian medicine. So I went to the best public school and studied. When I was 16 I fell in love with a guy two years older than me, who helped me deal with all the troubles I had at home. When I applied for college, I didn't make it, because although my grades were very good, I didn't have enough to enter. So I entered another course. I had decided to continue fighting for my dream, so I continued studying for my exams. However, I started to grow up and see the world with a new light and I wanted to explore, discover new things while my boyfriend just wanted to stay at home, have sex and play video games. I really liked the afternoons spent in bed playing together and eating junk food, but I started wanting more. That's when he started to pull away till I realized I was being cheated with my best friend. It was horrible. I lost 7kg in the first month and went down hard, because he was one of rays of light in my life at the time. So I got up and continued studying, but I also began to have self destructive relationships where I would meet older men just for sex and I didn't even care if they used protection or not. That year I got in veterinary but my dad told there wasn't enough money for me and my sisters to go to college, so I said I wouldn't enroll and go to work for their tuitions. I stopped seeing guys and got myself tested for everything possible. But for the first time in my life, luck had struck me. Not only was I healthy but the government decided to give all of us a scholarship. So I was able to enroll. Right now I'm 20 and in my first year of college, and having really good grades. I'm focused and happy for the first time in years. I now start to have feelings for a friend of mine and although he's a bit older and we have fun I think this could work out. I'm still really messed up about some things, such as sex or some personal relationships, but I'm working on it. Although I still live with my destructive and negligent parents, I'm able to find happiness in all the little bits of life. Never touched any drugs, tried alcohol and didn't like it. I'm doing martial arts for self protection and hope to be a good influence on other people in the future. That's another reason why I wanted to tell my story. If you feel like you connect with what I told, please comment and I will answer and support you the better way I can :) I feel really good now that I let it all out. Thank you to all of you who had the patience to read this through. happyvet

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  • I made a post few hours ago.. let out all shits i've been living through these days.. samr shit different story here, my dad have no job and huge debts, my mom worked hard but intimidated by many debt collectors who came to ny house, house certificate had been given in return of huge amount of money to pay my dad' previous debts (yes, he did it again, but we all live moderately, knowing my dad's salary when he was still working) . I got scholarship so i can continue my study in university, and do part tine jobs.. i really grateful that we all still can live and eat, me and sis can go to scholl... but knowing my mom suffering really makes me want to quit study and get job to raise my family...make my mom happy.. she refused to get divorced though, due to the culture here (southeast asia) and afraid of my dad violance... this really touched me, thanks , i'll work hard on my degree and pursue my dreams too.. :) good luck on your future (and mine too) :))

  • tl;dr

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