I feel like I'm dying internally. idk. I'm constantly fighting the negativity and self-hatred that just pops into my mind every other thought. but I'm starting to feel like I am losing my strength... I'm just tired of fighting to survive. I'm also trying not to be reliant on substances like drinking or weed. but it's literally about to be 5am and I can't fall asleep. my head hurts. my heart hurts. someone pray for me... I need God to pick me up and show me the light at the end of the struggle tunnel.