I've been super close to cutting again all week, and Tuesday night I grabbed a washable red pen and used it to slash at my arm and I'm really getting anxious about it again, like I know I'll soon cut. I don't want to, but I know I will :(
Instead of a pen, try a marker. Also I suggest getting a red Buddha Board- you draw on it with water and it evaporates away. It's a zen thing about learning to live in the moment and not let your problems bother you because they will disappear with time. It helps me calm down a lot, especially when I listen to music while doing it.
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