Do you people have any experience with self harm? do you still do it?
What are the good reasons to take a vacation leave? I already tried 3 times but kept on being "not approved". Seems that I can't take a vacation leave for a reason I need a break from work and needs a vacation. Any help?
before i sleep i alayws pray that i dont wake up , i hope i die , because i dont have the balls to kill myself i tried shocking but i couldnt do it , i just dont want to live anymore nothing matters really , im the biggest pussy on this planet i dont even have the guts to kill myself
1st Ramadhan, 17 May 2018. That's the end of my life, my world.
I'm worried because my bf doesn't really use FB messenger much, however earlier on tonight I noticed that all of a sudden he's unusually active on it, hours later he's in the other room while I'm lying here in bed, wondering what he's doing - I just checked and I can see that he's active on it right now - I worry about why he'd be on it at 4 in the morning. I think he just saw me come online because he just stopped being active. It worries me because I know a girl he had a crush on from his old high school is on his profile alongside a few other cute chicks in general. Would anyone else be concerned? If so, what do? I don't think I can even say anything without coming as a obsessive but I can't help but be concerned.
Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment where I might get diagnosed with cancer. I am almost too afraid to go. I can't fall asleep. I wish I wouldn't have to go through this.
Moved to a new country because my Mom lives here and is now really sick, I'm self employed - I work on remote projects online so I can't even use work an excuse to meet new people so quickly I've became lonely with no friends. I finally plucked up the courage to go to a local event for foreigners to chat, I met a nice girl and thought maybe we could be friends. A few weeks later she contacts me asking me if I'm staying in the country and acts all nice and interested in me - I'm really happy because I just want any friend at this point I'm so lonely, it turns out that she just wanted to use me, in recruiting me for some work event. When I firmly but nicely declined it a few times she still kept pushing for it barely bothering to hide her eagerness anymore, just wanting to talk abut that. I feel really sad and worthless, I have bad social anxiety to the point where I can barely look people in the eyes so even just to go that initial social meet was a big deal I had to psyche myself up for. Making friends for me is really difficult and for this to not work just dents my confidence even more. I don't know how to make friends. I'm 25 and female with no social life, I'm living in a pretty small city so there's not too many events, not even Meetup covers this place - it's too irrelevant to be mentioned on any expat groups plus obviously being self employed I don't get to meet people often, I even joined my local gym but then that closed down shortly after I don't know what to do.
I don't want to, but I think I need to start looking for another job. My production numbers and metrics are just not getting where they need to be. I keep trying to do what I need to and it's not working. I'm tired of trying. I'm sick of it seeming so easy for other people and it never is for me. I'm sick of crying before work. It feels hopeless and the stress is breaking me. I have to work my ass off and get lucky to barely meet my goal. I'm tired of it.
For years I thought I have depression, because, well, I'm depressed all the time. But now I think I don't have the actual illness, but just a shitty life. I don't know if it even makes a difference, but somehow this seems like a huge discovery for me - I'm just not sure if positive or negative.
If people knew my secrets, i think Id be dead. Id rather be dead if people knew.