I have seen tremendous horror, pain, and anguish from an accident. I can't get the terror out of my head. I can't stop hearing the screams of anguish and gut wrenching pain. I am haunted. And no amount of pornography will satisfy or soothe.
my parents left me alone at home for 15 days, they left this morning, im 25, our house is huge, they left money for me to like eat and gas etc and the car... u know what is the worst, with all these amazing things, i just am alone, and i realize it too much and it hurts a lot, i had a bike crash once and i had 12 surgeries and it was horrible but loneliness definetely hurts way more,also takes years of ur life... anyway i was thinking about telling that girl at the gym that maybe if she wanted to hangout, we could , and then if we did hangout, i could tell her some things that i want to tell her, for example that i like her, and also that im alone and i get scared of ghosts and i wish there was someone here who i trust, to enjoy all these nice things that are here, and to b with me but im really scared and sometimes when im talking to girl i just get stuck im terrified of saying anything, ever since that one person that i admire a lot talked to me and then never did again, cuz i must have said the wrong thing, now im always scared of saying something wrong, and i dont really talk, i kind of just say yes or no, and look down or away from people,whenever i talk with someone is just about training or small talk and i hate small talk, anyway idk it shouldnt be like difficult right? like if she doesnt like me then shes gonna be nice about it hopefully. and ill just avoid her forever, i wish she was here rn tho. after being depressed bad and not cleaning my room or washing clothes, i did both today and my bathroom is super clean and my room, and then i bought a new bluetooth speaker cuz my old one broke and this one has lights and i love it and i wish that she was here rn with me listening to music and i kiss her right on the top of the head :p
no one answered but im still wondering, if it would be a good idea to make a tinder profile where its anonymous and i only explain what fetishes that i have and what im looking for and maybe have a body picture. what do yall think?? im like, really lonely and im sick of it i figure id just try to have sex
I got hired on at this retail job as "seasonal". Part of me really likes it and hopes they let me stay on permanently. ...but another part of me hopes they let me go and we part ways gracefully, because despite liking this job, the instability and isolation isn't good for my mental health. But idk where else I'd work. I wish I could just... be a stay at home parent. But alas I'm not married and don't have kids to stay home with.
when that one person i like makes a prayer live stream she always mentions the lonely and that God should comfort them and stuff, i feel like shes talking about me and that i should go away, is that just my anxiety? i feel like it isnt,cuz i felt like she never seen almost anything i wrote so id just write repetitively a lot like spam the same thing, but what if its the opposite, and she read a lot of it, and now she thinks im retarded, desperate mentally ill or a psychopath. also yea i am really really lonely , when u think about health and stuff, people talk about fitness and food but we try not to talk about how being lonely and not ever getting hugged or affection will make u sick too. despite everything i do im still sick and unhealthy because i dont know love i guess, i dont know what i should do, i will be alone at home for new years. im a person who is honest a lot irl, and i was thinking to just be really honest and just tell someone that i dont want to be alone at home , that im afraid of ghosts, that i dont have anyone to be with me, but i dont have anyone to say this to
I am in a loveless sexless marriage with my wife and I am angry and depressed all the time. As a Christian I'm worried to even use porn anymore (I don't physically cheat though) and have considered leaving her because I can't stand it.
I just wish someone would be here and hold me in their embrace, the kind of one that just makes the world stop and feel good for a moment
My father invited a drug addicted woman into our home two years ago. Her home was condemned and my dad let her stay with us until she got her own place. Long story short she stole over 3000 dollars from him, his wallet and despite my warnings and actions against her, he ended up in a nursing home because he couldn't afford living at home. I got landed the house for a short two months, working myself trying to balance the bills and debts he accumulated, my own life and a newborn. She broke into the house on Christmas to steal my dads meds which I kept in a safe. luckily she didn't succeed. My father passed away two months after. She was never seen again. And I have hated her since. I had nothing but pure and unbridled resentment. She is a huge reason my father had to go to a nursing home. She took advantage of his kind heart, and she stole from him. She lied right to my face about it. I was so furious, I nearly killed her. For two years I held pure hatred for her. I heard once she got arrested and i used to work with her brother in law. I told him I wished she would die. plain and simple. sometimes I wondered where I would be, besides prison, if I ended up killing her that night. Im a pacifist by nature and a Taoist so violence and these deep feelings aren't my way of life but she just brings out the worst of me. WELL, two days ago, my ex landlord and good friend texted me and told me that she died. after two, almost three years, she finally snuffed it. First I was relieved. I was excited. I celebrated for goodness sake. but after two hours I was left with pure depression. Three years I was carried with vengeance and hatred. Now her fate caught up with her. But it doesn't fix the problems she made. it doesn't bring back my father. I don't regret celebrating her death. I regret letting the feelings of vengeance and rage hold me so long. The Tao says "When someone comes to do me harm, I will not harbor thoughts of revenge." its a two edged sword.
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I'm having trouble in my relationship. We've been together about 5 years and I have the feeling we have developed in different directions. I'm not sure if we will able to find a way to communicate through our issues and it's really depressing me. He is my closest confidant, we have built a life together and I don't want to lose that. I want us to be happy, I want him to be happy, but I don't know how we're going to turn this around. I know everyone is going to say I should break up but I love him and don't want to lose our life..