last night I did get a chance to visit with some members of my family from my Uncle Jacob and my cousin Meosha and my niece Lexie, and my stepsister Ladonna . Well my sister Vanessa on the other hand is still acting like a horse's ass bitch ,she came by last night and dropped the papers off to her mom and she dipped off to her vehicle. I am really worried about her and her depression state right since her boyfriend Ty dumped her without explaining to her ,she said that she's okay but I think she's lying cause she doesn't want her mom in her business or something. Just everyone keep my sister Vanessa in your prayers ,I just hope that she stops her knucklehead behavior towards the family.
So I'm weird with babies. I always wanted kids ever since I was younger, and I am good with kids I have a niece and a nephew. But a few years back I just wasn't getting my period at all. so after months of medication, and being viewed as a medical mystery. Turn out I have a birth defect where I wasn't born with a uterus or a vaginal canal. so yea
Why did I reopen this wound? I was on my way to moving on. I did good the last three months. I was kinda happy...ish. But he has been on my mind a lot and no matter how hard I tried to let it go and move past this miserable heart ache, like some dewy eyed imbecile I cut open a scar that's long past healed. Why did I start texting him again? Why, in a night of drunken waste, did I tell him I love him? Did i forget the pain i put myself in before? like those four months never happened? Am I an idiot? a gluten for punishment or both?
my life is so devoid of purpose that I genuinely think I'm gonna kms once i leave school
Rose talked to me today. it's always the same when she talks to me : i get the happiest i ever get and can't stop smiling and almost want to cry of happiness, but then the first couple of hours pass and i realize she isn't my close friend, i won't feel her arms hug me , i can't have a real conversation and tell her everything i want to, then it feels worse than it ever feels, cuz i realize how far away she really is. i can't stop loving her and i wish i just did, i wish tomorrow i woke up and didn't care about her, but i can't, i think about her everyday,she's my hero and gave me hope about life, and i can't stop thinking of how much i love her
I know I am deeply depressed. I had tried different things to distract myself from suicide which would only work for months then I need to find new distractions to not kill myself. I found hatred to keep me alive and been working for a year & half. Also, I made a promised to someone that I haven't fulfill so it is keeping me alive too. Recently, hatred is almost not enough reason to kill myself. My family and relatives are abusive, manipulative and emotional abuser which also made me depressed. They are so toxic too. I want to kill myself already to end everything. Because of hatred, I said to myself that I will be the one to see them die and buried. But I badly want to kill myself now
I'm genderfluid and terrified. And my therapy has been postponed again and I'm getting really derealised and a kinda su*cidal, and my dad IS REALLY su*cidal again. I'm so scared and angry and alone, but I can't speak out because I'm so terrified and I don't want to worry people
I can't fit in nowhere and keep gett iij ng fired from jobs. i I just wanna kill myself.
every boy i talk to they say im ugly. it really never effected me untill there was this boy he was really cute and he seemed diffrent from all the other guys i had crushes on he was funny nice and kind but then i ask him do u want to date he said no i ask him why he said i was ugly then i had a full mental break down i tried to kill myself 3 times and i ended up in a mental hospital i cried myself to sleep for months and looked myself in the mirror everyday i tried to say i was pretty but i couldent i knew i was ugly and i still feel the same i will always be ugly and i will never find love
I wish I didn't care about what people think of me.