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so....ive been raped and I don't know what's wrong with me....maybe I'm I'll or something but I can't stop myself. I've been watching rape movies, videos....even trying to find a realistic portrayal of it in porn(sucks).im not sure why.i don't enjoy it or get pleasure,it's just that I can't stop myself. even when it gets too much to watch or too painful...i force myself and continue watching then try to find one that I could relate to.i hate myself for watching it.it makes me feel sick and just disgusting.

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  • It’s just your brain trying to cope. I suggest drinking

  • You need professional help. I'm not trying to be mean. What you're doing is trying to force yourself to normalize rape in your mind, to make yourself think that what happened wasn't so bad. It's not a healthy coping mechanism and you need help finding one that will actually help you. I wish you the best of luck.

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im wearing this smile that i don't believe in

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  • at least you can still wear it. i used to do it but i just can't it anymore

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Sadness is a really nice feeling. To be honest thats a really weird thing to say, but when you think about it, you get sad when you had something valuable and lost it. and in my eyes, thats the point. i had something that made an impact on my life, i had something that made me happy. i just had something. I may be sad that i lost it, but i am happy that i had it. In a deep philosphical way, time isnt real, so if all i have left are my memories, i am okay with it.

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I am 57 year old male never had sex how do you girls all the time no matter what age and to get down to the nitty-gritty I need sex American Fork Utah any went out there let's take a chance

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  • More like American No Fork LOL.... Fork you

  • Oh it you, American Fork creeper. You’ve been posting your shit here for months. Guess what... It ain’t working! Because this isn’t a fuck app! Try OurTime or SeekingArrangment or Fetlife

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sometimes I write and post stuff here before I say it in the public just to see if the things I do is sociologically and ethically acceptable to the people. If not I try to change what I say and mostly say nothing at all. And at this moment, I'd like to say this, I'm the kind of person who sometimes feel bad for massacre killers and have great sympathy on them (and I know I also feel bad for their victims but I also feel bad for them ) just because the things they deal with are the things I deal with also. Depression, severe bullying, emotional abuse and not really liked by people just because of being quiet. Because sometimes these mental and emotional struggle we experience is driving us insane ti even affects us physically (internally and externally). But me, I never wanted to attempt to murder people and become a serial killer just because I know it's gonna cause me great trouble and great destruction to my future. Plus, slaying someone's life is not worth it even though their attitude makes me wanna kill them right off the bat. I still care and try to understand that society sometimes are crazy and they pass it on to you. And what does killing have to do with my benefit of pursuing how to save a life?

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  • Well, usually, serial killers aren't normal people like you and me who are just depressed. They often have psychological issues that go far beyond what any normal person could ever understand. They have a completely different thinking structure, don't feel empathy, are schizophrenic. They often don't kill people because they hate life, but because voices in their heads tell them to do it, because they can't understand why it's bad to do it or because of some reasons we can literally not understand. Like, for some of them, killing a person is as normal and 'mandatory' as it is for us to go get a bandaid if we cut ourselves.

  • I feel bad for them in the sense that I feel bad for anyone who is emotionally suffering. But once they choose to use that suffering as an excuse to harm others... I have no sympathy for them. None. That was the choice they made, and such evil deserves no sympathy.

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i feel like i took a leap of faith by choosing to not to go to college. but it's so hard to work on your own like this. i understand now why people go to college, but i think i still won't go.

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  • Even if you don’t go to college you still need a job skill. Then just start saving and investing your money

  • i feel this

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I cum very little and even tho girls act like it's nothing i can feel sometimes they are mad about it or smth but idk what to do

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  • When her eyes are closed throw warm mayonnaise on her face. Problem solved.

  • You watch too much porn. Less cum and smaller dicks are so much easier. Sure a 10” monster dong is fun once, but after age 20 no girl wants that shit in her

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I lost my job yesterday :/ im crying non stop

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  • I am so sorry.

  • It must be hard for you, but there's still tomorrow where you can find another job. Take a deep breath, and try to remain calm, don't forget to rest too.

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I feel so lost with my major right now. I don't know what the heck I'm doing. I know college don't give me fortune or even stable jobs (as for my bio major). And I'm not happy to get in to med school. So I'm lost. really lost. ANd I just want to get rich honestly. Just want to focus on my income. So far I'm not in debt because I have full scholarship. only enough to pay my whole fucking tuition plus housing. But I'm lonely. Plus the major I have doesn't even introduce the specific science I want. And like what? I have to go to grad school to do that? What an actual fuck? Another money spending... And right now, I'm just way too depressed looking at my money and I only have $20 on my bank account, almost homeless and thinking how I can manage to fit that as my food allowance for three weeks. My brother, took the easiest major, and manage to double major and have excess sum of scholarship and have a stable job after. Plans to go to law school. But I don't like his majors. I took it and it was depressing even further. And his success and mines. Sometimes I look at myself, what the hell am I doing wrong? My brother told me he's always there to help me but I feel bad asking him for money. I have a job it don't even pay well. Then this other class I already failed it because I work last sem with two jobs and I'm stressed with this one either. I don't know anymore. Whatever...... I don't even know what I'm saying. All I just know I want to run far far far away where these feelings won't hunt me....

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  • So, you’re saying college is a scam?

  • Never be ashamed to ask for help.

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I'm scared of this reality called life...The more I think about it...I'll just go deeper until the voices won't shut up and fall into depression...They say accept the reality of life but how 😧

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