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I'm worried because my bf doesn't really use FB messenger much, however earlier on tonight I noticed that all of a sudden he's unusually active on it, hours later he's in the other room while I'm lying here in bed, wondering what he's doing - I just checked and I can see that he's active on it right now - I worry about why he'd be on it at 4 in the morning. I think he just saw me come online because he just stopped being active. It worries me because I know a girl he had a crush on from his old high school is on his profile alongside a few other cute chicks in general. Would anyone else be concerned? If so, what do? I don't think I can even say anything without coming as a obsessive but I can't help but be concerned.

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  • It's gonna say you're active every time you are on fb but if you think he is talking to another girl either ask him or leave it alone. He is allowed to have conversations with other people. Don't make him stop talking to other people just because it bothers you, if you trust him stop watching his every move and hope he is trust worthy enough to tell you if he's doing something he shouldn't be, if he comes clean appericate it, if not then guilt will tear him up. Let it be.

  • Maybe he just found a fun game on facebook that hes become weirdly addicted to and is too embarrassed for you to find out?

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Tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment where I might get diagnosed with cancer. I am almost too afraid to go. I can't fall asleep. I wish I wouldn't have to go through this.

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  • I hope the result is you are healthy.

  • Your pain is completely understandable. i'm sorry. i'm so afraid of cancer also, that's why i do sports and try to eat healthy. it's so scary

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Moved to a new country because my Mom lives here and is now really sick, I'm self employed - I work on remote projects online so I can't even use work an excuse to meet new people so quickly I've became lonely with no friends. I finally plucked up the courage to go to a local event for foreigners to chat, I met a nice girl and thought maybe we could be friends. A few weeks later she contacts me asking me if I'm staying in the country and acts all nice and interested in me - I'm really happy because I just want any friend at this point I'm so lonely, it turns out that she just wanted to use me, in recruiting me for some work event. When I firmly but nicely declined it a few times she still kept pushing for it barely bothering to hide her eagerness anymore, just wanting to talk abut that. I feel really sad and worthless, I have bad social anxiety to the point where I can barely look people in the eyes so even just to go that initial social meet was a big deal I had to psyche myself up for. Making friends for me is really difficult and for this to not work just dents my confidence even more. I don't know how to make friends. I'm 25 and female with no social life, I'm living in a pretty small city so there's not too many events, not even Meetup covers this place - it's too irrelevant to be mentioned on any expat groups plus obviously being self employed I don't get to meet people often, I even joined my local gym but then that closed down shortly after I don't know what to do.

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  • There's an app called Bumble that maybe you could try? I've been using it. I have social anxiety too, but that app keeps me from meeting too many people at once, because I'm in control.

  • hobbies etc. not just any hobbie but something that you really like to do

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I don't want to, but I think I need to start looking for another job. My production numbers and metrics are just not getting where they need to be. I keep trying to do what I need to and it's not working. I'm tired of trying. I'm sick of it seeming so easy for other people and it never is for me. I'm sick of crying before work. It feels hopeless and the stress is breaking me. I have to work my ass off and get lucky to barely meet my goal. I'm tired of it.

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For years I thought I have depression, because, well, I'm depressed all the time. But now I think I don't have the actual illness, but just a shitty life. I don't know if it even makes a difference, but somehow this seems like a huge discovery for me - I'm just not sure if positive or negative.

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  • In just the last couple of decades doctors have been heavily encouraged to understand depression and just a chemical imbalance, because this ideology sells pills. while symptoms of depression can be chemical imbalances and many times people can have great lives and be chemically depressed, but that is really not the norm, at best they're outliers. what you ,OP, is feeling, is that your depression is inside your realm of capability of action. that basically means you are in the majority group of people who don't have chemical depression, they just make bad choices with their times and don't do things they actually want to do or don't feel in peace with whatever they actually want to do which might be some bizzarre or even illegal shit

  • In just the last couple of decades doctors have been heavily encouraged to understand depression and just a chemical imbalance, because this ideology sells pills. while symptoms of depression can be chemical imbalances and many times people can have great lives and be chemically depressed, but that is really not the norm, at best they're outliers. what you ,OP, is feeling, is that your depression is inside your realm of capability of action. that basically means you are in the majority group of people who don't have chemical depression, they just make bad choices with their times and don't do things they actually want to do or don't feel in peace with whatever they actually want to do which might be some bizzarre or even illegal shit

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If people knew my secrets, i think Id be dead. Id rather be dead if people knew.

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  • Those must be some secrets.

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I really hate advertising on Mother's Day. I'm glad it'll be over after today. It's tough being bombarded with everything about moms when yours isn't here anymore. I was driving to work yesterday and heard an ad on the radio saying something like "Gifts for your mom are great, but you know what she really wants? Time with -". I was worried it would say my mom wants time with me, so I turned it off. Well, no shit. I want time with my mom too. I'd give anything to spend more time with her. I'd cut off my own foot just to hug her again and hear her voice. Unless you can go back in time and save my mom's life, shut it. I wish there was a way to ignore all mother's day stuff while still going online and listening to the radio like normal.

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  • There this article that talks about a woman who created/coined mother's day. She herself disowned the holiday. Read her article on google...

  • I know it's hard to miss a parent, but you can't take away from other people. I'll admit that every holiday or celebration got overly advertised and commercialised, however, it still wouldn't stop people from posting stuff on Facebook about their moms, or for people to talk about it being mother's day. urs is gone, but you can memorialize her on mother's day, remember her. cuz you can't just want other people to not get this time or celebrate their moms that are still alive. you say you would do anything to be with her, well don't take away from those who still do have their moms either. you can still be part of mother's day even if your mom isn't physically here.

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it has been almost 6 months since i actually felt nice and confident; this is mostly my fault because i haven't been productive at all and my training is way behind

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I WANT TO LET THIS OUT: I have a professor that touched me in my college two years ago. When he did that, I never came to his class again. I tried and tried to pass his class because I need his class and he's the only professor teaching it and it's only offered in one semester I know I need to pass his class. He was horrible, and it also came with a coincident time my father died from a car accident back in LA. I live in a different state so I have to fly down there to attend the funeral. I came back with a note that I came for a funeral and he never accepted it and failed me in my 30% exam without any chance of re-take because he only accepts a doctor's note (not death, sports, conference notes etc). He never said this in the syllabus that he never accept beyond a doctor's note. He never really remembered the time he touched me I guess but he did again. He touched me.. now the end of semester, I failed his class. My GPA went down and I lost three scholarships that only help me afford a college tuition. I was stupid of not dropping his class but I want to graduate on time but him in my life, that probably hindered me what happened to me made me emotionally confused. Now you see, I only have a father and a brother as my relative and since my dad died, I'm by myself (my brother lives in europe away from me), I don't know anyone on my mom's side or my dad's side. And since I lost three scholarships, I have to do something about it. The time my professor touched me then, I felt dirty actually and used it as my asset to work as a stripper. I quit my dreams as pre-med student and majored in something easier to afford paying for college and graduate on time. It's so hard you know. But now I'm a stripper but I'm in no way telling my brother because I know how he'll feel bad that he failed me. But I don't want him to know my problems and pas it on to him. He's my ONLY family. Now though, I'm trying to make an evidence that he touched me so next time I can sue him. And right now my grades, I'm working on, I'm two points to get the grades back and get out of stripping already. I honestly don't like it but it pays me good money tbh. Good money.

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  • Best of luck for youu!

  • Invest your stripper money so it lasts after your stripper career

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I used to cut myself, to feel something, existence. Now I have lost all respect for myself. Sex I guess has replaced my cutting. Its great, fun, pleasurable, I feel excitement and adrenalin flowing through my veins from it. Cutting was usually my wrist or something, usually from anxiety. But this new part of me takes all my energy when I dwell on it. I would love to go back to this old habit, but I see no point. All the factors that lead into this part of me is bizzare. I am so far in this mess that I physically cannot change my decisions, I am that far gone.

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  • Try BDSM. It’s awsome

  • be safe...herpes is no joke...

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