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My friends and I saw a spirit one night. One of them died 3 years ago today and I'm just wondering why tf he hasn't visited me since he knows I can see spirits.....

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  • I believe spirits are real, but they're not dead people. They're their own creatures, perhaps living on a different plane of existence that thinly overlaps ours. I'm sure if your friend could visit you, he would. Don't hold it against him.

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so my husband has been fucking my "best friend" for about two months and she doesn't know that I know. we're poly and she knows this but she still went to him behind my back. he of course told me right away but I've waited to see if she'd tell me and she hasn't yet. I'm just upset that she feels the need to hide something from me JUST to hide it and that she's clearly not the friend I thought she was. she's due with her first baby in a couple weeks and if she hasn't told me by time she has him I'm cutting her off (which means he will too). to make it worse we've even had several conversations where I've expressed that I would be ok with it and that he doesn't do anything sexually without me knowing. she's constantly telling me to leave him too because "he doesn't love you like he says he does"...yeah he's not the one who's lying to me. (the only bright side is I getting excited about sharing him so at least I'm still getting something out of it.)

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  • I like romance as in "18th-19th-Century-Prose". You and your lifestyle sicken me and I think you should overthink polyamory forthwith.

  • maybe she knew your husband told you, so you already know. some people won't tell you something if you already know about it. now with that being said. my bestfriend slept with someone I was madly in love with and lied to me for 9months about it until I found out from someone else. and even after I knew, I confronted her and she lied about it for another 2 weeks.... so I know how you feel. and it's near impossible to forgive in those situations. it takes time, it takes a lot of heart and some aspects of it you aren't totally over. our friendship will never be the same. we still talk, I didn't cut her out completely. but I have moments where I feel bitter, where it's uncomfortable to be around her and it's hard to trust her again. if I were you, instead of waiting for her to say something confront her. saves u a lot of time and gives her a chance to say something about it. the comment below, the part about losing friends and not knowing why, i've had that happen a lot too...and some I still don't know what it was. but if someone thinks I hurt them or theirs something they don't like, i'd prefer the chance to change it or understand what happened. There's a lot to factor in and every situation is unique. but thats my 5cents

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I moved to a bigger city a bit over a year ago to go to university, and I love it when my parents send pictures of the cats to me. I really wish I could have taken my own cat with me when I moved out, but she's so used to a big house and a big yard that it'd feel wrong to make her live in a dorm room. My parents are happy to take care of her and the rest of them but I still miss them all.

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All my friends think I shouldn't be with my boyfriend. To be clear, my friends aren't assholes who try to interfere with my life; it took them quite a while to speak up because they didn't want to ruin it for me just because of an opinion they have. But then they slowly started questioning me about whether I'm *really* happy? And don't you, I don't know, want to try dating some other people before settling down? Recently they went as far as giving me an intervention. What really was the killing point for me though was when this one guy, who's dating my friend and had met my boyfriend and me for the very first time, later apparently said to her: "he's terrible, please tell your friend to ditch him". Like... It's one thing if my friends have this opinion, they might be biased, but if a total stranger has this impression upon meeting us the very first time... Now the thing is, I love my boyfriend and I don't see any problem in our relationship. I never did. But after this I do and I don't know how to deal with it. I don't even know what exactly it is that people don't like about us - they always say that they "can't really explain", but I guess they just don't want to so they don't hurt my feelings. I don't want to tell my boyfriend because it would hurt him a lot, so I don't have anyone to discuss this with and I don't know how to deal with it by myself. By the way, my family, on the other hand, love my boyfriend and constantly tell me that I should do everything to keep him.

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  • You could talk to your family.

  • Take a step back and look at everything. How does he treat you? How does he talk to you? How does he act around others, and is it different than how he acts when you're alone? How often does he try to tell you what to do? Does he ever hurt you, physically or emotionally? Does he ever twist things on you and always make you feel like you're at fault? And be honest with yourself. Really analyze why people might dislike him. Maybe it's nothing to do with how he treats you, maybe he's just got an abrasive personality. Maybe he has opinions that most people don't agree with. Maybe he's just loud. Maybe he's nice to you but mean to others. Some of my exes were like that. The best person to me, but awful to others, or just rude. After looking at all of this, if you genuinely don't see a problem, then don't listen to your friends. And if you do see some problems or red flags, maybe think about what that means for your relationship.

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I missed my teenage years because my parents expect me to act like them. As a kid, I stayed home in my house and kids are not invited in because my dad doesnt want them too. So i acquired an antisocial attitude until at my teenage years. Now Im in my 20s and i still feel like going back to my teens because I never had a social life in those times. When i was in high school, I wake up, go to classes, alone, then go home tired and sleep then do homework, social media where nobody talks to me then sleep. The cycle repeats everyday. Now its the same in college. Though a larger community, and when I approach people they were different, not a teenager mindset and I still am.. so im considered odd to them because I act like a teenager. But for me i feel like i was in a comma for so long woke up and suddenly people around me are different.. and as if i never changed. Just because I never had a social life in high school. And continues to be the same in college. Like now that im an adult and suddenly given a freedom, im adapting to my age how people my age act like but its honestly difficult. And i realized life does not exist without people around us. And all this time i was always been dead inside because life with people does exist as if i dont exist.

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My friend asked if I could read her essay and tell her if there's something she should change or add. I turned her down because I've been tired (four days after she asked me because I was nervous about saying no) and now I feel bad. I've helped her with school stuff before, though... Should I have agreed after all?

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  • You should have answered her sooner. But tbh if you're not up to it, you're just not up to it. Your health is important. You aren't her tutor, it's not your job to read her paper. It would have been nice of you to do, but you're not a bad person for not doing it.

  • Well, it depends. If she's a good friend then it MIGHT have been a little selfish. Were you really so tired that reading her essay would have caused you more discomfort than the amount of discomfort that she has now that she didn't have someone to proof read her essay? Because I think that this is something you have to always consider. Of course you don't owe someone your happiness and well being, but if you cause someone more pain than necessary just because you aren't willing to sacrifice a bit of your time, that's selfish. Only you can answer for yourself whether you were really too tired. As for the fact that you waited 4 days: definitely don't do that again. That probably made her more stressed out than if you had said no from the start because now she has less time to find someone else to do it for her; I know it's sometimes scary to turn someone down, but it's better to say no immediately than raising false hopes

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I'm not sure how to word this properly, but I really want to share my excitement somewhere... I think I'm in my first poly relationship. I'm kinda dating this girl who has a boyfriend and he knows me and likes me, he's okay with her dating me and even encourages her to. I say I'm kinda dating her because we do everything a couple would do- we've even agreed that if we officially "declared" a relationship nothing would really change- but we haven't taken that step and officially declared it either. But she says she considers me her girlfriend, so I consider her mine too. And it feels so nice. I love her so much. I know a lot of people frown on poly relationships or think that it's cheating somehow, but no one is sneaking around here. No secrets are being kept. No lies are being told. It really is possible to love more than one person. And I'm so happy to be part of that.

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  • Congrats! Definitely talk to her about declaring it officially, just so there's no room for misunderstanding.

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Being in a career I love so much I don't look forward to my days off anymore. In school days I always got something planned with friends for the weekend but it all changed and that sums up my resolutions for next year I'm going to try to make time for everyone else not just myself and family.

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I love my brother and all but his smell is gross

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  • Is he a teen? I don't know why but a lot of teenage boys have an extra funk to them.

  • Mine smells too....

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Straight guys, help with a debate! Could Michael Biehn in the first Terminator get it?

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  • lol no

  • Get what? English is not my native language so I don't understand your question.

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