I'm scared of forming contacts with people. Becoming regular presences in each other's lives, I mean. Especially I'm scared of making friends. It just often seems to me that there is nothing I can offer to that other person, so I just feel like I'm wasting their time. I'm not a good conversationalist because I don't know what to talk about, and I don't know how to give moral/emotional support. I think the way I talk is annoying, and I constantly try to change it but it doesn't seem to improve. The only thing I can really do is doing favors to people, which I tend to stress about because I worry that what I do is not good enough. Currently I only have one friend in addition to my immediate family, and keeping in touch with just those few people is already tiring. But, embarrassingly enough, I feel lonely because they live a few hours away from me in different towns. I'm just worried that they secretly resent me and find me annoying, but put up with me out of pity.
I'm 22 years old and I have trust issues. I made a friend at the mine I work at though, he's pushing 50. Today was the third time I forgot my tag on the board when going home (For those who don't know, you put your tag on the board before you go underground so that management knows who's down there. When a blast is set, the underground needs to be clear of all employees because of gas and potential for collapses. When you forget your tag on the board, you bring production to a halt, because you're the only person who can take your tag off. You can get fired for this.) I got a phone call from my friend, who works a later shift than me and was still at the mine. I knew immediately why he was calling. He called me to tell me this the last time I forgot. Having already gotten a warning for the last time, my heart sunk when I answered and asked if all the paperwork was being taken care of. He answered, "Let's put it this way: I noticed before anybody else did, so you don't have to worry." Taking someone else's tag off the board is one of the easiest ways to get yourself fired from a mine. This man risked his career because he knew mine was at risk (and that I had left site...) People suck for the most part, so I'm glad to have somebody like that in my life. Words can't express how grateful I am. What a loyal friend.
it's hard loving someone who doesn't even exist anymore
I secretly sent nudes to my older stepbrother and said it was an accident. He said he's always wanted to see me naked.
I thought you had a beautiful soul but maybe i was wrong...
My only talent is pushing people away.
k I.k alixxx91 21 Bi red head justvwanna chat and see how it goes x
Deleting my snapchat...Mite end up regretting it tho...
Even though I act like I like him, I hate my best friend's boyfriend. When she comes during the weekends she keeps bringing him 9/10 times and they're sickly in love I rather wanna get my eyes removed than watch them. I just want my weekends back with my best friend!
I isolate myself so much focusing on my career that I feel like I’m losing myself trying to be someone I’m not in order to attract the attention of anyone because I just really want friends. I really only have 1 friend and she just seems to have her shit so much more in order than I do that it’s kinda hard to keep up. I might be depressed. I can’t even afford therapy. I flirt and use sex as a way to try take my mind away from how lonely I am. I don’t know what to do. I’m really losing myself and I feel it. I had such a fire in my heart that’s now dimming so slowly..