It didn't take long to show what an arrogant ass you are... again. Well shame on me, I never learn.
I wish I had enough friends- and a date- so I could throw a New Year's Eve party. Instead I'm going to watch the ball drop with a bottle of moscato in my hand.
A really close friend of mine annoys me extremely lately. She complains. Just complains. All the time. Mainly about how she doesn't have a boyfriend and doesn't think she ever will, sometimes also about people at college, how they're all stupid and annoying (ironically her reason for hating them often is "they complain about their stupid little problems so often"). I don't know how to tell her that she's getting on my nerves without upsetting her (as you can probably tell she's quite unstable and I'm a little afraid that being too direct to her could make her... Do something stupid or at least make her sadder than I intend to. We're friends, after all).
My friends and I saw a spirit one night. One of them died 3 years ago today and I'm just wondering why tf he hasn't visited me since he knows I can see spirits.....
so my husband has been fucking my "best friend" for about two months and she doesn't know that I know. we're poly and she knows this but she still went to him behind my back. he of course told me right away but I've waited to see if she'd tell me and she hasn't yet. I'm just upset that she feels the need to hide something from me JUST to hide it and that she's clearly not the friend I thought she was. she's due with her first baby in a couple weeks and if she hasn't told me by time she has him I'm cutting her off (which means he will too). to make it worse we've even had several conversations where I've expressed that I would be ok with it and that he doesn't do anything sexually without me knowing. she's constantly telling me to leave him too because "he doesn't love you like he says he does"...yeah he's not the one who's lying to me. (the only bright side is I getting excited about sharing him so at least I'm still getting something out of it.)
I moved to a bigger city a bit over a year ago to go to university, and I love it when my parents send pictures of the cats to me. I really wish I could have taken my own cat with me when I moved out, but she's so used to a big house and a big yard that it'd feel wrong to make her live in a dorm room. My parents are happy to take care of her and the rest of them but I still miss them all.
All my friends think I shouldn't be with my boyfriend. To be clear, my friends aren't assholes who try to interfere with my life; it took them quite a while to speak up because they didn't want to ruin it for me just because of an opinion they have. But then they slowly started questioning me about whether I'm *really* happy? And don't you, I don't know, want to try dating some other people before settling down? Recently they went as far as giving me an intervention. What really was the killing point for me though was when this one guy, who's dating my friend and had met my boyfriend and me for the very first time, later apparently said to her: "he's terrible, please tell your friend to ditch him". Like... It's one thing if my friends have this opinion, they might be biased, but if a total stranger has this impression upon meeting us the very first time... Now the thing is, I love my boyfriend and I don't see any problem in our relationship. I never did. But after this I do and I don't know how to deal with it. I don't even know what exactly it is that people don't like about us - they always say that they "can't really explain", but I guess they just don't want to so they don't hurt my feelings. I don't want to tell my boyfriend because it would hurt him a lot, so I don't have anyone to discuss this with and I don't know how to deal with it by myself. By the way, my family, on the other hand, love my boyfriend and constantly tell me that I should do everything to keep him.
I missed my teenage years because my parents expect me to act like them. As a kid, I stayed home in my house and kids are not invited in because my dad doesnt want them too. So i acquired an antisocial attitude until at my teenage years. Now Im in my 20s and i still feel like going back to my teens because I never had a social life in those times. When i was in high school, I wake up, go to classes, alone, then go home tired and sleep then do homework, social media where nobody talks to me then sleep. The cycle repeats everyday. Now its the same in college. Though a larger community, and when I approach people they were different, not a teenager mindset and I still am.. so im considered odd to them because I act like a teenager. But for me i feel like i was in a comma for so long woke up and suddenly people around me are different.. and as if i never changed. Just because I never had a social life in high school. And continues to be the same in college. Like now that im an adult and suddenly given a freedom, im adapting to my age how people my age act like but its honestly difficult. And i realized life does not exist without people around us. And all this time i was always been dead inside because life with people does exist as if i dont exist.
My friend asked if I could read her essay and tell her if there's something she should change or add. I turned her down because I've been tired (four days after she asked me because I was nervous about saying no) and now I feel bad. I've helped her with school stuff before, though... Should I have agreed after all?
I'm not sure how to word this properly, but I really want to share my excitement somewhere... I think I'm in my first poly relationship. I'm kinda dating this girl who has a boyfriend and he knows me and likes me, he's okay with her dating me and even encourages her to. I say I'm kinda dating her because we do everything a couple would do- we've even agreed that if we officially "declared" a relationship nothing would really change- but we haven't taken that step and officially declared it either. But she says she considers me her girlfriend, so I consider her mine too. And it feels so nice. I love her so much. I know a lot of people frown on poly relationships or think that it's cheating somehow, but no one is sneaking around here. No secrets are being kept. No lies are being told. It really is possible to love more than one person. And I'm so happy to be part of that.