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I procrastinate, when it comes to removing hair from my nether region. When I do get around to it, my underwear fits so much better.

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  • Why is your underwear so tight that pubic hair affects the way it fits? My underwear fits the same whether I have a full bush or bare skin. It's not healthy for clothes to be that tight down there, your junk needs to breathe

  • Same... until it starts to grow back and my lace underwear turns into microscopic hands snatching and pulling each and every stubble

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I'm 23 and I still sleep with a night light.

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  • There's nothing wrong with that. I do that too. Just for me because I sleep in a bunk bed and I'm afraid of falling down just because there's no light

  • I have battery candles on a timer!

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4chan is the reason why I will never send nudes.

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I may be the only person that likes those, but I love these obscure Hoodies that vaguely imitate the look of a greatcoat or a "(German) Uniform from the first half of the 20th century" or similar. It's the perfect look for a pseudointellectual armchair historian and I objectively look "good" in those.

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  • Why are you all so offended by his clothing choice, it's not like he said he loves to wear a devil's costume to church? Honestly asking

  • Am I the only one who has no idea what he means :/

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Today at work I was looking over some applications for trainee positions, and when I read that the first applicant was born in 2002, I thought what the hell, why is a 5 year old applying for a job? Then I realized. I'm old now.

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I got a children's discount from a bus ticket even though I'm 20 😂

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How high can duck fly ?

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  • Fly so high he touch the sky

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I stayed indoors for the whole of summer so when i went back home i instantly turned 8 shades darker lmao i love how it gives me a nice tan but i really cant stand the daily 40-50°c weather here anymore. Everyone here hibernates throughout the whole year and only come out when it's winter

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What I say: I'm going to the bathroom. What I mean: I'm gonna play Tetris for 45 minutes

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Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.

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  • how is the cat brought back?

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