I work overnights and I'm afraid of the dark.
One warm spring day, I went for a walk deep into the woods. I found a secluded spot somewhere and stripped completely naked. I hid all of my clothes in a secret spot where no one could find them. I started to walk naked and barefoot through the woods for a while, but I had to take cover because it turns out I wasn't alone. There was a young woman walking through the woods a short distance away. I hid out of sight, naked and horny as she went by. What surprised me was, I recognized her as a former coworker from several years back. Lucky thing she never saw me. I waited until she went by, then soon made it back to my clothes pretty soon after that. I then got dressed and left.
I was shocked and speechless when my boyfriend showed a video of his friend showing off dick. They are drunk. This is my 1st relationship and even though I also watch porn, his friend's the second dick I've seen from someone I know/and our age. I came from conservative family and almost 30 years old.
I just found out she asian. She took off her makeup. 0_0
My first teen crush was a squirrel. A fictional cartoon squirrel named Conker. Twenty years ago, "Conker's Bad Fur Day" came out for the Nintendo 64 and eight months later, I saw it in action and I fell in love with the titular character of Conker. What was it that made him steal my heart? His grin...😂 Some of us are crazy but we can sometimes be way too eccentric, while most teens were chasing guys and girls and exchanging numbers, I was fawning over a red alcoholic squirrel with a perfect grin that melted my heart Haha.
There's only two genders but there's 86 mental illnesses.
There's nothing more embarrassing then finally talking my new girlfriend (whose already self conscious of the size of her ass) into letting me try the super slowmo feature on my phone to shake it for me.. She finally agreed and my phone says *cannot find moving object* 😂 fml. She thinks she has no ass but she totally does!! None the less, I enjoyed it in the moment
Over the years, this used to get to me but tbh I love seeing what I can only assume are SUPPOSED to be grown men with the mentality of 16 year olds try and start arguments on platforms like Reddit,4chan, Twitter,etc. It's funny, and I mean that in an unironic sense. I would argue all day but now it's just trolling with these types. I can't believe I used to let them make make mad lmao. ...Calling everyone else snowflakes as you huff and puff angrily over your sticky, cheeto dust encrusted keyboard. Jumping into dms typing entire essays but calling other people triggered. I called out how retarded the ´´super straight´´ trend is on another platform, and got this dumbass guy jumping into my messages to argue that it was a ´´valid sexuality´´ (proper quotation marks don't work so hopefully doing this will do for now) and that I was just triggered by straight people. He then assumed I was trans, and then told me (retard points for assuming shit like an idiot- I'm CIS) it was because no one wanted to fuck me. He also proceeded to get even more upset when I didn't fall for it and fly off the handle like he wanted me to- and why would I have? He was making an ass out of himself. AND. Being called a virgin is a weak ass insult dude. I'm not so insecure about myself that saying shit like that hurts. I don't need to prove anything like you do, Bradley but please, keep telling me you're not using Nazi symbols and you know because you're Jewish. Keep looking stupid.
#democratscheated Let's see how many people get unnecessarily triggered over that. 😂
If you hardly speak my name you can just call me babe for short