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This bitch really thinks she's better than me lol H-O-E i can ride that Hoverboard with my A-S-S...You get on my level xd

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  • 12 year olds problems 😂😂

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Went down the road to a fancy dress party. I was Woody from Toy Story as a gay looking cowboy hat and some jeans are easily accessible at the last minute. Anyway I hooked up and fucked a ghost. At least I thought she was a ghost. Turns out it was just one of the muslim hoe's from next door. Oh well. Least she didn't blow me. Up.

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  • It's a true story. Can you show me where I even mentioned the race of anybody please? Dumb motherfucker

  • Wow imagine being this desperate for attention that you want to make up some inflammatory bullshit on an anonymous confession app.

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So....I quit my job :D

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For years i suffered because of dandruff...But now thanks to Nizoral...It's only a minor inconvenience :D

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My New Year's resolution is to stop procrastinating so much. So far... not off to a good start, considering I put off even starting until the second week of January LOL. But I'll keep working at it. Hopefully by the end of the year I'll be done with procrastinating for good :)

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  • Good luck and a few general tips that help most people: instead of setting a huge, vague goal like 'stop procrastinating' or 'become thin', it's advisable to define a fixed goal that's actually measurable, like reaching a certain weight or in your case maybe 'When given a task I'll always complete it in either 3 hours or 3 days depending on the nature of the task'. Then it's almost crucial to break that down into baby steps, like 'by March I want to have completed 1 task immediately and 5 other tasks at least faster than usually'. Again, it helps most people and doesn't have to help you, But most people give up because they don't follow these steps.

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Turns out i got the cooties bro, I'm getting a shot...In the buttocks...😮🔫...This is what i get for fucking around with Aphrodite the goddess of Puteria gave me aids...

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  • Such a shit joke, lol

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I don't understand why some want to hold their excretion in their azzyhole, I mean it will rot inside your body and in the long run may endangered you with colon cancer. Let it go, let it become helpful microorganisms.

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Now before you do me dirty, just ask yourself...Would you do Shawn Mendes like dis?

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Whatever she can't take the d**k anyways 😟😂😅

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  • Oops someone just got rejected.

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I am trying to eat less food because of my frequent fluid bowel movements. It's becoming tirong to keep saying no when my family members keep on asking me eat more.

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  • Do what i do. I am a 6f male and i weigh 60kg and i always tell people i am on a diet. its a joke, and they fall for it.

  • If they bug you about it, just tell them you've got the shits and you're trying to spare your flaming asshole from spending another hour in the bathroom spewing out everything you put in your body. They'll never ask you about it again lmao. (also if this is a frequent problem you have, you might want to see a doctor, dude. That's not normal.)

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