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I smoked so much weed yesterday my throat hurts

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XFL is coming to destroy the NFL.

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  • They tried that before and lost tens of millions of dollars. Nobody wanted WWE-Rugby in 2001 and nobody wants it now

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This guy my former professor.. I have feelings for him but it was a taboo so I can't do that. BUt my feelings for him is kinda strong that it eats me inside. And the only way I can let him go is buy screaming out his name out loud on the top of my lungs with both love and rage. But I can't afford to be identified publicly because I don't want to be judged (even though the person don't now only by face) and if I do it at home my neighbours would think I'm crazy. So basically I hiked to some place where not much people are around wearing a mask (not a clown mask I can't afford to scare off people with those clown hype back in 2016). I found a more private are and I literally did that shit. It felt so good I punched a tree (thin trunk) and broke it in half. Then walked down the mountain still wearing the mask. I then changed clothes in the public restroom. i threw away the clothes and go around the city I live in then went home. That was the craziest shit I've ever done that actually felt so good. I let go of a problem, threw some stuff (someone who is a minimalist) and discovered new places. It's a three in one.

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  • Sounds awesome :D

  • I actually saw you change clothes in that public restroom! I liked how you took the time to jack yourself off while wearing the clown mask!

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Why do people dislike random ass confessions? Like, I’ve never had a confession without dislikes. Are there like three people who dislike every confession?

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  • I don't like dumb post so there's your reason

  • There's only 2 people who hate every confession. There used to be 3, but I killed them for the snuff film that I making.

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I had a dream last night where there was this youtuber convention in my town in the uk, and the people who were running it hired a bunch of Brits to take the youtubers from the airport or whatever to the convention and kinda hang with them before it started. I got Logan Paul to spend time with, because I don't watch his content and they didn't want people who were working to be huge fans of the people they're kinda protecting. So Logan Paul and I start to hang out and it's super chill and he's nothing like he is in his videos. We become friends and flirt a bit and then I say something shitty so he walks off to this bus all his friends are in. I go looking for him and see his brother on his bus, who says something to him and he looks at me then turns away again so I just walk away. Then I woke up. After this I couldn't just let it go so I spent another hour while awake fantasising about all these things like us hanging out and me being the British voice of reason if he tried something like the Japan stuff again. And it was all really nice so now I have some strange feelings for Logan Paul 😂

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Milky Baby, who ever invented you, must have a very active imagination.

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I don't care what anyone says, cat farts are the worst kind of farts. Dog farts are bad, but cat farts just smell like death. And to top it off, my dog has never farted while laying in my lap. I wish I could say the same for my cat.

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Fuck me now or forever hold your peace

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  • How about I fuck you with my piece?

  • crickets

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Before the false alarm, a ballistic missile attack in Hawaii came into my phone and my family's. My mom reacts very slow in terms of emergency saying its fake and all. Then calls her colleague who basically hanged up on her... Here my dad whos just laughing and making fun of my brother panicking. Well my dad is always clueless and absent minded in the world around him because he thinks my mom is around to lean on.. as long as my mom is around not reacting he keeps with his verbal jokes and whatever he does.. then me just prepairing the emergency kit closing up the house and just calming my brother down and telling him to prepare everything. And keep checking the time (because before false alarm it says 15 minutes the missile is coming which actually just scared me too but my family is going crazy so i cant show fear). When my mom finds out after 10 minutes she just sitted in the couch attempting to pray the rosary nervous. My dad getting to make fun of my brother more. Saying youll die of heart attack before the missile strikes,him just sits in the couch attempting to watch the movies he likes thinking everything is a joke and ehining how all of us are dumb looking for a missile attack like he had no idea what it was or something. Like bruh thats how my family will react if the missile attack is ACTUALLY real. Then turns outs its false alarm and then my dad make fun of my brother more and my mom goes along with the joke making my brother feeling humiliated. My mom now tells moral stuff to my brother that next time stop panicking because its picnicking her more. Me continued to prepare emergency stuff and store them somewhere where its easy for me to reach juzt in case next time theyre real (because if i put it somewhere, my parents will throw it away) while my dad also made fun of me thinking im crazy and not listening thatthe missile attack is false alarm and whatever verbal jokes he does and why need to prepare for something not yet there.. or at least not anymore (like come on! Im doing it just in case and i know whats going on im not absent minded!) Then i go on chill go back to my own thing. My family is crazy and quite dysfunctional just by observing it....

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  • I think I will be very panic too, I am glad you are cool head enough to start preparing something important, better be ready. Just keep on being prepared, your parents will come to their senses and take some responsibility too. I hope nothing happens, that everyone is safe over there.

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I got hit on for the first time in my life today. Most akward 20 min of coffee drinking in my life.

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  • Just by a random person? are you male or female? how did the conversation go? tell me!

  • Congrats! It... doesnt really get much better. At least most of the time.

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