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Whatever she can't take the d**k anyways 😟😂😅

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  • Oops someone just got rejected.

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I am trying to eat less food because of my frequent fluid bowel movements. It's becoming tirong to keep saying no when my family members keep on asking me eat more.

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  • Do what i do. I am a 6f male and i weigh 60kg and i always tell people i am on a diet. its a joke, and they fall for it.

  • If they bug you about it, just tell them you've got the shits and you're trying to spare your flaming asshole from spending another hour in the bathroom spewing out everything you put in your body. They'll never ask you about it again lmao. (also if this is a frequent problem you have, you might want to see a doctor, dude. That's not normal.)

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I went to this province area in the philippines with my friend. And she wore theseripped jeans. I mean she loves ripped jeans a lot and thats basically what she wore ever since we were in high school. But while passing by their kinda downtown theres this really nice old woman giving my friend some money to buy her some new nice clothing. Im assuming the old woman thought we're homeless "taong grasa" in filipino. I was cracking up because the jeans was expensive and bought from this store... true religion and their clothing is "expensive!" But the old woman just sees it as ugly. We tried to explain it to her, she just dont get why wear destroyed clothing. For me i never understood in the first place why buy a jeans from an expensive store where you can just buy cheap ones and destroy it lol...

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  • I agree, I always thought it was stupid to pay extra for torn up jeans.

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I love giving gifts that people love. Really personal gifts that mean a lot to them. But I also like to give goofy gifts/gag gifts as jokes, or prank boxes with good gifts inside. I just love surprising people with things that will make their day just a little better.

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I still unable to sleep. Some parts of me missing, amd I can't operate normally.

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  • yeah happens with amd sometimes. better get yourself an intel.

  • Which parts? Maybe we can get you some spares...

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Anyone here farts a lot? One of the many reasons why I don't date is because I fart quite a lot... Who would want a woman like that? LOL

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  • Maybe if you learn to play some tunes on the butt trumpet it would be more enjoyable. Just don't push too hard. Nothing worse than unexpected thunder dumplings.

  • I fart a lot and my man's just accepted it as part of me. He doesn't like the smell, but he loves me enough to overlook it and keep a can of air freshener on his nightstand. Trickiest part is holding it in during sex when he's on top.

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the saddest thing i ever had to whitness is guys trying to make their voice sound deep. everybody got a gift from god, but a deep voice sure aint yours. apart from that; did you know that you hear your own voice deeper than others, because you dont hear it through air vibrations, but skull vibrations?

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  • I did know that. I don't think you always hear it deeper though, I think you just always hear it altered. I hope you don't always hear it deeper, cause I often hear my own voice and think it sounds too high and really annoying :( I'd die if it were even higher pitched

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just cooked the nastiest pair of shrooms an now my whole home smells like a damned christmas streetmarket

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A couple weeks ago I did group work with two French exchange students in a literary analysis lesson. A few times, when we finished with an assignment and waited for the professor to give us a new one, they would speak French to each other. Now, those two don't know this, but I've studied French in before, and though I wouldn't attempt speaking it anymore, I can still understand some words and structures... and swears. I had to try my best to keep a straight face because one of them kept cussing for no apparent reason even though she spoke English with a rather polite tone. "Putain this", "putain that", it was really hard not to crack up.

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  • Putain de merde! Salope!

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I have realized I dont not like toddlers after I had a child and now I'm not looking forward to my son being 3..

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  • If you raise him well, he won't be terrible. I mean kids will be kids. But a big part of how they act is how you raise them.

  • Return him for a partial refund

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