I slept for 14 hours today. and i have not eaten anything in i think 48 hours. my only liquid intake is energy drinks and alcohol. if im lucky i can start my job again in febuary or march. but until then this is life i suppose.
I have this irrational fear of being assaulted during a run. There are so many reports about female runners getting attacked and assaulted. It even happened to a woman in the next town on a Saturday morning...it really scares me. I know I sound irrational but it does happen from time to time that you get followed in the park by strangers or get stopped and asked personal information. It makes me feel really uneasy but what am I supposed to do? I can't call to police on a guy who happens to cross my path 10 times on a 5k (even though he was on a bike and for that should have been a lot faster than me by foot) and keeps staring at me. I just hate the feeling of being this helpless. And it angers me how every woman knows this feeling because it's "normal" and happens to us regularly...
I am craving kisses so bad right now. I can't stop thinking about it. If it were sexual urges, I could just masturbate and make it go away, but I can't kiss myself. I can't simulate someone kissing me back, not in a believable way. Ugh I hate this. I wish I had a boyfriend or girlfriend to make out with.
I'm feeling all of these things at once and I'm not sure what to do about it. I'm excited, scared, nervous, happy, afraid, like im about to cry, about to throw up, about to yell from happiness. This doesn't happen very often, only once in a while and I'm not sure why, does anybody have an explanation?
Today I made a wonderful spice cake and some of the spice was from 2003. I just couldn't throw away the old spice, so I continue to use it little by little. Girls, forget men and get yourself some cats to live with. Kitties will treat you right. They don't care what you look like...you won't have to purchase makeup and you can build your bank account with the money you save. I think some makeup if applied incorrectly makes one look like a drag queen. ha ha.
I could play kids games on my phone all day :) Im a child at heart but I’m sure that’s looked down upon to be a child at heart also I can’t find any good iPhone games their all boring no games that I want to come back too or can’t stop playing so I download thousands of games play one time and delete instantly I’ve always been a child at heart
I think David Blain is a the greatest coolest magician ever known.
I don't want to drive to work. I want to work from home.
i feel so alone in life.
I feel guilty when people give me gifts, especially expensive ones. I feel even worse if the gift is spontaneous/without reason, though I still feel this way on my birthday and on Christmas. Christmas isn't as bad because I can at least give something back- but if they give me something expensive I feel bad for not being able to do the same for them. I just feel undeserving of gifts.