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After a whole month of not cutting myself i did it again. i hate myself i dont want to live anymore. my boyfriend and friend started to tell me that the way I love is wrong and saying this like people don't show their love like that . I wish I had the courage to tell this to thier face: I'm sorry that I'm nothing like you and I'm afraid to show people love because its always tured against me .I'm sorry I can't be normal like you because you haven't been through what I have, sorry I can't be someone you want sorry I can't be perfect for you

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Rose is the best in the world i love her so much it hurts everyday it hurts so frickin much shes the only person who understands me but she dont talk to me and it hurts so much i dont want it to hurt anymore i just wanted her to acknowledge me and see that im a real ninja and that we both want same things in life and i just want to do good and stop having money problems and get paid for my art and have the chance to show im the best at jiu jitsu i learning soooo much kimuras because they're the best, and i knew they were the best because Rose does them, its really easy if u just do things like she does u will win because shes smart as hell :/ not everyone acknowledge that i wish u all knew that shes a frickin genius and after she got slammed she maybe dont seem so smart anymore but she still is i promise shes a genius and i love her... i will prove everyone that she was a genius way ahead of her time by fighting like her and winning on everyone.. she always say to have fun in training and shes so right because shes so smart... im getting a thing so i can do ice baths with my friends also Rose made a prediction for me saying i would have friends, well guess what i just made 2 frickin friends who are my friends sooooo hard they help me when i needed sleep and ask me to hangout at their place and get me in on their drug dealing job they are super my friends and im so happy... im gonna make even more just like she said :p anyway yeah i started writing because i get just really really really really really sad i feel like she like ignores me or doesnt like me or that ive been annoying, i just wanted to get her attention since she doesnt seem to see my dms :/ its not that im crazy im just trying to have her see it, the last one she saw while i sent it she hearted it and it was nice.. i wish shed read them again and i wish she was my friend and i wish my kind of style was her favourite kind of style and i wish the way that i train was her favourite martial arts and the food that i cook be her favourite kind of food and i know we have similar music taste and i wish she talked more about musics every song she recommend i fell in love so hard and she listen to things i listened and im sooooo annoying and picky with music i wont listen to almost anything i dont think its perfect and a vibe for me.. basically im just trying to say i love her and im in pain

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how do I tell my very catholic father that I'm, 1) not a religious person and 2) a huge lesbian?

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  • why u want to say that. trust my my parents are Catholics to but but i don't tell them iam gay and i hate God

  • Just say Dad I'm a atheist lesbian. sorted

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I had a horrible day today

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  • I pray your days now have been better that they were before

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I want a sugar daddy lol

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  • I want enough money in my bank account that I don't need to get some random dudes dick hard to live a good life.

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I thought I was doing okay with my body imige and all. But this last week (despite the fact that my weight has stayed constant) I've suddenly started to hate my body again. But I can never seem to shift enugh weight. So I'm stuck in this pattern and it sucks. I think it is the reason I can't find a relationship. But honestly I just don't want to look gross.

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tfw your friend keeps telling you your phone screen is too bright but you know if you turn it down you won't be able to read anything ..... grrrr

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  • Tell them to keep their eyes off you phone lol

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Maybe there are others inside of me

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Well today was a very quiet day today I didn't have to deal with no crazy calls today, well I posted some of my stories to my blog page on Facebook

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I am glad that my sister is able to get over what has happened to her with her previous relationship I am glad that she's able to stay strong for her child

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