Is it too wishful to fantasize about a man touching me gently, stroking my cheek or such? I have no romantic experience so I feel like I dream way too much about this sort of thing. Ugh, it's embarrassing.
I don't want to hate myself. But, I'm worried that if I begin to like myself I'll become complacent and start to not work hard enough. Of course an action like working is in my control, but it kind of feels like the threat of shame is the only thing that motivates me. "I need to study so I can finish this semester and eventually graduate and get a job to survive" - who cares. "I need to study because if I don't I'm disgusting and everyone who knows me will scorn me" - totally something I want to avoid, so it gets me to do things.
My boyfriend doesn't believe in Satan or God, or even Evolution, his theory is Aliens.
With this "confession", I have made 77 confessions. I've only had this app for about 2 months. Is that bad?
Dad complained to me and my siblings for not cleaning up for the holidays. I didn't do it because usually saturday is our cleaning day, but apparently next saturday - tomorrow - is a holiday. I had completely forgotten about it even though it's every year! I only remember birthdays. But don't worry, it's not like we're gonna get guests tomorrow.
You know what's annoying? Getting feelings that you KNOW aren't true but they stay anyway. E.g. phobias (for me it's about dust), jealousy when you see your partner talking to their friend who is same gender as you, and the classic "I'm worthless and global problems are my fault" -feeling.
My boyfriend may be living with me soon. I am happy about this. I won't be living alone anymore.
there's some dark shit out there man
I kinda want to set up a profile on interface/Whenhub as a suicide expert for free. Talk to some people going through a rough time. No pressure because I'll set my price to free. I don't know that I'm qualified but I came out the other end and read a bunch of books on it. Sometimes people just need someone to talk to. Not sure my wife would approve.
I kept having nightmares about my mother cutting off my dick. I think it's a metaphor for how she immaculates and humiliates me in public.