No one knows this but I have been planning out my suicide in silence lately. I have tried telling people how I feel in the past and always get treated like shit so this time I'm gonna keep it to myself (for the most part) until I have it all planned out.
are there any people here that like findom and being used for your money. if so I am a mistress and want to drain your bank account. I want someone to do exactly what I say and serve me
I belive Im toxic. I dunno how to start changing..
I just ate 5 painkillers and life hates me so much it didn't even work...
i want to make a lot of friends but im already 25 and almost no friends. i have 2 good friends but i feel like i could lose them at any time. not deep friendship... not sure if they like me cuz im so autistic and they probably weirded out that i like this girl fighter person so much :/
i should say her name i realize that now. guys sometimes i wonder if im legit crazy because why am i saying her name and spamming this is still a website everyone can read dang i wish i could delete everything here as well... mods can i do that somehow?? someone help i dont want ppl to know i actually feel this stuff omg i regret everything i wrote , its just i write way too personal even for a supposedly anonymous website i shared way too much omg i hope she never frickin reads this or anyone who knows here i swear im not crazy i promise and im getting over this crush and im not crazy and i have skills and im not hideous or creepy and i take baths like twice a day and im actually gonna make it and find a home i promise to myself and im sorry for weirding everyone out im just way too open and overshare and i hope i can stay quiet online for a while and i regret saying her name so many times online in different forums and sharing my identity god i must look so creepy to her im so upset why did i frickin post all these thing omgggg i just wanted to talk to someone and express myself somehow why did i had to frickin do this omg ... guys did i just ruin my fucking life forever omg
my friend invited me to start training at his house 2x a week for our upcoming jiu jitsu competition, i'll probably stay afterwards to talk and smoke a few joints before coming home, which is really nice, because ever since i came back home from vacation the rose thing has been worse than ever , most days being alone and not having anyone to talk makes it much worse btw as far as that goes i deleted every single message i ever sent her, and now if she ever opens our conversation for some reason, theres just gonna be here reply there , she wont even know what she was replying to, i wonder how much she will hate it, or be creeped by it. everyday i start to just want to kill myself more and more, if i was a good person rose would have liked me and talked to me more, since she didnt like me it means im a bad person and i cant have hope or dreams anymore, i cant take it anymore i never been this broken, when this all started i just was happy to finally have a hero and role model and to finally have romantic feelings for someone again after years, i didnt know it would turn out like this , and i would fuck it up so badly and ruin every chance to have her like me, im a failure i dont want to be alive anymore like this pls someone help pleasee
I really dislike the smell of oranges, the taste of oranges and I dislike the color orange too. blehh
being a woman sucks... have to give a speech infront of. a room full of people in a few hours. and I got my monthly visit a few minutes ago.... I'm wearing a white dress. thankfully nothing for on the dress... but had to use toilet paper for a quick fix until I can get a feminine product. and now I'm paranoid. this CANNOT be happening
I don't like ketchup. at all. I hate it.