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What will you all say to me, a grown man, about not being able to have a relationship?

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  • If you look it as an outsider it may look easy. Yet, relationship is never been easy, for everyone.

  • relationship needs understanding, it takes time.

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My girlfriend and I have been exclusive for about a year. It wasn't long after her breakup with her ex that we got together, and sooner yet after my breakup with mine. We've known each other and been friends for over two years, so we talked about personal topics while we were both dating our ex's. She told me from the beginning that after she had time to really process her breakup, she planned to "have all the fun she could," so I guess I should have known all along what I'm about to confess. She made a male friend who quickly became obsessed with her. When she realized he was touched with a mental disorder, and after he became too much, if you will, she distanced herself from him, eventually closing him out altogether. She even had me help her with this, whether it was showing up to a place they'd be on a date (with my own date) to release some tension, or asking him to leave her alone if he approached me at a bar while she had gone to the bathroom. This was while her and I began to casually date. I was fond of the guy, despite his over-the-top eagerness to be in the life of my at-the-time crush (currently my girlfriend). I was nice to him. Friendly, even. Anyway, after I got the idea to introduce him to my little sister, who has the same disorder as him, my girlfriend said she has something to tell me in person that wasn't ever relevant, but now is, to my own doing. That's when she told me that she had sex with the guy, and took his virginity... I was upset. I'm only human, after all. I didn't get angry with her, though. The way I see it, she did nothing wrong. It was technically none of my business. I just became silent for a few minutes so that I could place that unexpected fact into my reality. Process it, and then accept it. Honestly, I thought I was the only guy she slept with after her prior relationship, so there was that disappointment as well. We went to bed shortly after that conversation. I had told her that it's okay. I admitted that I was upset, but that I also know that she did nothing wrong. I told her to just give me a bit of time to process, and that was that. Before we fell asleep, I told her that I had missed her. She works 12 hour shifts for 7 days in a row, between 7 day breaks. I told her that a friend of mine thinks we're cute together, and that it's easy to see that we care about each other from an outside perspective. I confessed how bored I get when I'm not around her, and how everything fails to generally fullfill me when I don't see her. I also admitted that I'm uncomfortable expressing that because I'm scared to squeeze her like a bar of soap... It doesn't matter that she slept with him and kept it from me. She had a life before I came into the main picture. But I'm stuck in a personal debate. Is it really okay for her to have kept that from me? I guess I'm not 100% sure... Let me know your opinions, and thanks for reading.

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  • I think it fully depends on the way you've talked about past relationships and all that sorts in the past. I don't really know how to explain it, so I'll give you examples from my life: me and my boyfriend, for example, are the talking-about-everything type. I've told him every detail he wanted to hear about all dudes I've ever slept with, even the ones that came after I met my boyfriend (when we were only friends). I specifically told him that this openness is important to me, and asked if he disagrees, and he said he doesn't. If I now found out that he slept with someone he hasn't told me about, I would feel betrayed. On the other hand, there's my friend and her boyfriend. The two only live in the now, she knows only one of his exes, but only because they're still friends. He never asked about her exes, and she never saw a reason to tell him. They simply don't talk about it. She wouldn't like to hurt his feelings, and she doesn't want to feel jealous if he told her that he was intimate with another one of his friends, so she doesn't ask. You see what I mean?

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We had serious server crush and data loss. We had done everything to come back online. Confesster team.

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  • Thank you for still existinng and coming back to us. This app means a lot to me.

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For a little over a week now I have been having both sexual and casual relationship dreams about a newer coworker of mine and it is killing me!!! I can barely be around him at work without getting all flustered and the worst part is is that I dont want to like him! hes a great guy and all but I have been with my current bf for almost three years and I love him dearly and nothing is wrong with our relationship! So Im confused to why I am even having these dreams about someone else when I am happy with what I have?? and I just want it to stop!!

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  • It could be just infatuation, spend time with your current bf, find new side of him, fall in love again second time. You can do this.

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I am in a loving committed relationship. Things are great sexually and emotionally, and we have been together 2+ years. I have been having very sexual (and some cute) dreams about a new coworker of mine and I can't get him out of my head!!! I have never had this problem before and I can not even be around this guy without stuttering and going red... its been every night for at least a week now... what is wrong with me and how do I make it stop????

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  • It's normal. Just deal with it like a decent person and don't cheat and you're fine.

  • its okay its normal to have attraction to other guy, it doesnt have to mean anything , just dont give in to the temptation...

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You people are actually helpful. I thought that everyone would be just rude but i was wrong. Thank you for helping me and others. Love you all =)

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My wife prefers me when I'm having an affair. She said I was happier and more carefree like when we first got together. And she's right. I honestly felt so much closer to her and loved her more deeply when I was also seeing someone else. She doesn't know what caused the change in me, but when I stopped cheating, she said she misses the happier me from a few months back, she even said I should find my way back. What should I do?

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  • I think the issue is that you don't love your wife and need a break from her. don't string her along. tell her the truth please

  • Maybe take a deeper look at why you aren't happy with your wife. There's something you dislike about your marriage or this wouldn't be happening. Maybe see a marriage counselor to get an outside opinion and some help.

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there's this guy I really like but idk how to tell him. we are really close friends and I think he feels the same way, but if he doesn't I don't want to make things weird. we've been friends for 6 years so I don't want to ruin it by saying anything. please help, I need some advice about what to do.

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  • Telling him about your feelings will not ruin your friendship. If he feels the same, it'll be great to date someone you already know very well. If he doesn't feel the same, it'll likely just make things awkward for a few weeks and that's it. If he were to get upset or something, he would not be a very good friend.

  • If he's single, then go for it. More power to you.

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What would you do if your boyfriend was calling other girls pretty and texting girls even when he made you get rid of your guy bestfriend and went ever let you text guys, but he texts girls and doesn't have a reason as to why he does it, and told me if it was the other way around, I'd hit the curb. Also we have a kid together and love together....????

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  • He's an immature douchebag....find a better role model for your kid.

  • dump him. he doesn't trust you.he's controlling you and thinks he can do better

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I’m 20 and I don’t think I will ever go on a date. Even online conversations get my anxiety to a level where I have no clue what to reply, and after every message I send, I’m convinced that the guy has had enough of me and won’t text back. But even if he does, I get anxious because I feel like he’s hoping for something he will never find, and would eventually get disappointed and leave. Every time I give myself one more try, I get back into the same cycle and prove to myself how inadequate I am all over again. I hear people saying they feel more comfortable when they chat online, and I feel pathetic for being the only one that doesn’t.

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  • wow i do exactly the same. im a guy

  • My parents only started dating in their late 20s without having dated anyone before, and it worked out even though they were both really shy. I believe you can get a date too.

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