I think my boyfriend's brother has like a thing for me. His gf just started like hating me out of nowhere and like she made him put pics of them outside of their door (he's kinda our roommate rn, he doesn't have a job and their mom kick ed d him out after he graduated.) and like ig I wouldn't want my bf around a girl that dressed like me either tbh. Not that I dress slutty or anything (well tbh just for him, I do.) but I have a big and thicc thighs and like decent sized boobs, so like yeah, anyways that sounds super conceded (sorry), but yeah since I had my son, he's been all talkative to me and the baby but like not really his brother unless I'm around, they almost got into a fist fight yesterday because my bf said he was checking me out, then like he always tries to wrestle with my bf (his brother) whenever I come into the living room, like really trying to show off, and I giggled and he like smiled really big and I asked him why and apparently, it's this dumb little snort I do. Tbh I think he was just making fun of me but my bf said he was complimenting me. Funny story (kinda explains what happened a little bit before I met my bf) I was actually texting his little brother and big brother, (they all have different last names, due to different dads) so yeah, so then one day I started text their brother (my bf) and then it just clicked with him, like right away, but his brother's weren't to happy about it, when their brother started bringing me around, so my bf's older brother like never talks to me anymore, just his brother when he sees him, sometimes. His younger brother never really said anything, because they have a really good relationship (its absolutely adorable) and he didn't want to mess anything up, and I agreed with him because nothing happened we were just kinda getting to know each other (which is weird because I later found out from my bf that he's a major fuqboi, so idk.) and that's not really doing anything wrong, right? My bf is really convinced that something's up but I don't think so, I think he's embarrassed because we talked about some crazy things. Plus my bf is like kinda aggressive, so like yeah.. Anyone? What do you think?
Yesterday, my boyfriend had a interview. He is considering another job, due to working in a highly stressful work environment that is taking a mental and physical toll on him. He mentioned working at a location not too far from a town he may move to. The town he is considering to live is 25 minutes away from me, which is closer to me versus him living over an hour away from me now. Today he mentioned that his roommate's girlfriend works in the same town where he is considering to work. He has spoken about her before, and there are days she is there while his roommate is gone. During the three times he had mentioned her to me, I would get a thought that maybe he is a little attracted to her. The other thought is that maybe she could be attracted to him as well. I can only hope that they haven't been intimate with each other. I try to dismiss those thoughts. I sit and think about that he wouldn't do that. Then again, if he did, I live about 68 miles away. I chose to be in a long distance relationship. For me to accuse him of that without proof, would make me silly. There is a point where my consciousness set in, and the answer was not to worry. We are not married, and if we love each other there would be a point where we cannot look for one of us to hurt each other. When one of us does or admits making a mistake of hurting the other, and asks for forgiveness; then a choice will be made to accept their forgiveness or not. If love is there, forgive and continue with the relationship. If the mistake is to much to bare, then it's best to part ways. No one is perfect, but don't accept being hurt over and over again. Then I calmed down and continued to watch YouTube, until I fell asleep, on the couch.
There's no justice in Portugal, my country has the worst judicial system of the West. The politicians that led the country into bankruptcy not only weren't arrested but are still in charge. Same as bankers and CEOs of the biggest companies. They were all in collusion to rip off the tax payers money. What really kills me is that Portugal is the country where bad shit happens and everything stays the same! Also rapists and pedos rarely see jail time because the judge think they deserve a second to be good citizens still.
Listening to music from speakers on high volume in daytime isn't against my house's rules, but I wonder if it could still be considered rude. What do you think?
I'm depressed constantly, I hate literally every aspect of myself, I am honestly only happy when I smoke bud, all my physical and mentally trauma all go away for awhile. it gives me peace. Sometimes I just can't live anymore, I just drag myself through each day. I try to change it by going out but my anxiety always gets the best of me and I ruin everything. again.. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this, this only thing keeping me afloat is my 2 month old son, his father is great and everything but we fight alot and he is just as messed up, so it seems like all there are are hard times and its draining and it breaks me into a million pieces everytime, I feel like there's nothing else. It's just us 3, but he has friends, I like it when he goes out because we fight less if hes out. Also like I am so in love with him that it confuses me why we are still doing this charade, like we get each like no one else and we understand each 9ther more then anyone else in out lives, so I don't understand what our problem is.
One of my pet peeves is people assuming that all fixations are of sexual nature. People in general ARE huge perverts, I'll give you that, but it's still possible to have obsessions that are not fetishes.
This sucks, I like anal more then my boyfriend. After all his bitching, like are you fucking kidding me? He said he loves seeing my ass bounce on his dick but he just wasn't feeling it in the ass, our first time doing anal was last night and mmm, I slept good, I came twice when ever we were experimenting positions lol then he wanted to do anal and then I legit came again haha and know he doesn't want to do anal 😭😭
Becoming dependent on someone's affection and validation is what I try to avoid. I feel that once I begin to embrace that action, I will accept it, and it will become an addiction.
I had tried to tell two different people at different times in my life, that my adoptive parents were abusive, mentally, sexually and physically. The first time I told a social worker and I didn't know they were really close friends with my parents, so after the home visit for another kid, she told my parents, and I didn't get to eat that weekend and I was beat by my father, and my mother had everyone in the house come spit on me and ignore me for like 3 months. Then the second time, I told a counselor because my mom punched my face and broke my nose, but again my parents are such people person' that they convinced my counselor that I was just a rowdy foster kid, that I was lying and what actually happen was I was trying to wrestle with my brother and things got out of hand. Then when we got home, my parents acted like everything was fine, then my mom went into the kitchen and grabbed a skillet and hit me in the head with jr, when I came to my older brother was on top of me, when I went to scream, he shoved his fist in my mouth. I tried to tell my mother then she got even more upset and called me a whore then she dragged me to the bathroom and threw me against the toilet, grabbed my hair and smashed my head against it and told me this is what I get for being so sick and disgusted. The toilet was so nasty I accidentally threw up, that passed her off even more so she dragged me over to the tub and held my face under the running water, I accidentally started freaking out because water was going up my nose and in my mouth. So um.. yeah, I never told anyone again about what went on behind by homes door until I met my boyfriend 2 years ago and it's helped alot.. kinda haha
im new and i came to confess my dirty secrets and adult desires. idk what im doing