It's midnight right now and I'm lying next to my boyfriend, who I will break up with tomorrow. Today he did something that I can't get over, but he's too drunk right now to have a conversation and I don't know how to get home (busses don't drive at night). It's a very strange situation and I have no idea if I can even fall asleep. I am not even crying because it's such an absurdly horrible situation that I can't believe it's really happening.
Are you giving up on me? Don't you want to try something first, even if we're far, just to see?
I'm in my 20s and I'm fat. I'm a little over 300 pounds. I've learned over the years that it doesn't matter how nice, fun, or friendly of a guy you are if you're fat. if you are fat you are automatically rejected by every girl before even thinking of asking them out. The few girls that aren't shallow are already taken buy bigger guys that were lucky enough to catch them when they were single.
Why do I end up worshipping people and losing their interest because of it?
I've only said I love you and truly meant it to 5 women in my life that I wasn't related to. 3 of them I met online and never seen in person. 1 I loved so much that I got her pregnant on purpose and 1 is still one of my best friends to this day but we're not compatible with each other outside the bedroom... maybe I should try online dating again lol
Are we enlighting an old and enigmatic shadow zone of our past or are we loosing ourselves in a source of hassle? I'm pretty sure we could be happy together, but right now, as we are wandering in this labyrinth of confessions and unspoken, it is normal to feel some apprehension. Maybe it's a necessary step, the end will be better if we go on, untill we find a common ground and we recover each other
At the same time it makes me feel a bit anxious to know he needs to think a few days/weeks/months (even if I hope it's not months) about the situation before texting me again, and at the same time I'm still able to feel some love towards this guy. I want to understand what was wrong with us and why, I want to apologize.
The girl in the pretty red dress Standing across the room Living life to the fullest As a flower in bloom The girl with the smile To brighten every day The one that will never be mine The one causing pain Ripping out my hart With every look thrown at me For ever, we'll be apart For she dances with kings Noblemen alike And I am but a stable boy Not worth to be by her side
I know this guy for like 6 months, we went on date today, we were holding hands the whole time i had so much to say but i couldn't talk i just wanted to be there and stay quiet i was really enjoying his company. and on my way home i had this weird feeling, i don't even how to describe it, i mean i was sad and confused i wanted to stay with him but at the same time i think that he wasn't really enjoying his time cause i was overwhelmed. we went out so many times but I've never felt this way before. I'm scared
There are moments where I feel that I love too hard and fast, that I lose. I doesn't feel good, but as long as I wake up breathing, something good can happen. It just takes patience.