i love my gf and i know she loves me too, theres no doubt about it. but she broke up with me because of her family who will only let her get married to someone of the same culture and background as her. i didnt think anyone could love me as much as she loved me (as ive dated kinda a lot) i dont know what to do because i cant have her and be with her when she feels the exact same way. its killing me
I keep thinking back to this day when my friend and I were assigned to be partners for a school art project. This was before we'd started dating, way back before I ever told him I liked him. He invited me to his house after school so we could work on the assignment, and I should have been happy to spend time with him. I mean, he was my greatest friend at the time. But I was melancholic and heavy-hearted all day because I couldn't stop thinking about how much I liked him and how he didn't have a clue. It was really tearing me up inside. His parents were out of town and we'd been at the dinner table working on the project for a few hours. There was a huge thunderstorm going on outside and we kept seeing all these news reports on the tv saying that they might have to shut down a few roads because of flooding. It was awful. On top of that, the windows were leaking and the lights kept flickering and dimming like the power was on the verge of going out. It was getting really late and I was supposed to be back at my house by then, but I couldn't because of the storm, so we kept working. Then his parents called him on the phone and he went outside and sat on the front steps to talk to them. I was watching him from the doorway and I just thought he looked so cool right then. I mean, the rain was really crashing down, all of the trees were swaying back forth, there were lightning bolts in the sky, car alarms were going off. It was chaos. And he was sitting right before all of that chaos, oblivious to it. I remember thinking that I'd rather draw him sitting on the front steps talking on the phone in the midst of a thunderstorm like that than work on some mindless art project for school. I also remember looking at the outline of his shoulder blades on his shirt and thinking that they reminded me so much of angel’s wings. And then I all of a sudden felt like I was about to cry because I just didn't know what I was supposed to do. I wanted to tell him how I felt about him but I was so afraid that it would destroy our friendship, especially because I truly thought he was straight back then (yes, we're both boys). It was killing me, it really was. So I went back to the dinner table and worked on our project because my heart couldn't bear to watch him any longer. I don't know how much time passed but I ended up falling asleep then and there and I woke up to his hand on my shoulder and I heard him say "Hey. You might as well spend the night, it's twelve-thirty a.m." So we went up to his room, and I remember how I could still feel the weight of his hand on my shoulder long after it wasn't there anymore, and how I wished he would put his hand on my shoulder again and leave it there, but he didn't. He gave me one of his shirts and sweatpants to change into, and he let me sleep on the recliner in his room. But I couldn't sleep at all. I think this was the very first time I spent the night over at his house, and it was also the very first time I wore his clothes. And that was all I could think about for the next couple of hours. It was around three in the morning when he sat up in his bed and asked me if I was awake. When I told him I was, he asked me if I wanted to go for a walk, and I said sure. We ended up walking into town and taking the stairs to the roof of this multi-storey car park building. While we were up there I kept looking at these two stray cats that were asleep together on top of an old truck. I was thinking that they were probably a couple, and he asked me what was on my mind. So I looked at him, and god, I almost did it. I was so close my heart was hammering. I almost told him ‘I think I might love you, it’s been on my mind for so long now.’ But I was afraid of what might’ve happened next. It felt too rushed, too risky. So I just shook my head, said nothing, and got that horrible I’m-about-to-cry feeling in my throat again. When we finally went back to his house, it was around four thirty in the morning. He got back in his bed, and I silently cried myself to sleep on his recliner. It was just so painful. Realizing that I loved him was equally as painful and heart-wrenching and terrifying as it was thrilling and enchanting and amazing. I often wonder why I didn't tell him what I was about to tell him that night when we were up on the roof of that building, and why I instead subjected to even more pain and heartache. But I think the pain was worth it, because now he’s mine and I’m his and I’m happy. Happier than I ever imagined myself being. And even though it nearly killed me, I’m glad I didn’t rush it. I’m glad I waited for the right time to tell him.
When I first got married, my wife and I used to ask really elderly couples for relationship advice. Got some interesting ones. An old cop advised to move far away from old friends and family and start a new life. Where there are no exes or meddling mother-in-laws. That half his cop calls were over asshole family members with no boundaries. Another interesting one was an old Korean vet. His wife said, don't bad-mouth your spouse, because you may get over it, but words can't be unsaid. When they were young he had cheated during a deployment. She forgave him and they lasted 50 years, but her parents never forgave him. It's not their marriage, but he was never again respected in the family. It wasn't worth it. My advice would be, don't ever try to "win" an argument. This isn't Halo. You don't unload a clip of facts into your enemies and teabag them to rub it in. Your goal is till death do you part. Stay calm, listen, acknowledge and validate their feelings. Tell them why you feel the way you do. If your spouse "loses" the fight, the relationship loses. Let them retain their pride. They won't remember a word you say, but they will remember how you made them feel.
My wife's sister hates me. I wouldn't mind it, but she has a bit of an influence over my wife. They are very close, so my wife listens to her sister's advice. And apparently, recently she has started giving "hints" to my wife in the direction of a divorce. If my wife divorces me on her sister's ill advice, I will DESTROY that woman's life. Mark my words.
Yesterday the stress got to me. I yelled at my family and threw my jacket at the floor. Threatened to give up and leave. Work, car, school, extended family. It's all been to much. Strangest thing happened. As my wife and I were yelling my son calmly picked up my jacket and put it in the right place. Same with my shoes. He sat calmly until I was done and talked in a calm constructive manner. He was doing everything he could to deescalate the situation and he's only 6. He was talking about his classmate's parents getting a divorce earlier. He doesn't want that. This boy has some real emotional strength. This is a rare skill set. Calmness under pressure. Discretion. He's going to be a good man.
Sou jovem e sou tbm velho... estou falando de relações... Eu penso em quanta merda já aconteceu antes de eu chegar numa relação como a q tenho... sinto q meu conhecimento sobre isso foi destruído várias e várias vezes até que chegasse no período atual... isso parece triste quando vc é uma pessoa q acredita no amor desde o princípio... desde criança (talvez eu tenha passado muito tempo na frente da tv)... Não é uma coisa errada... Mas é tudo tão diferente... Não deveria ser tão complicado... é uma contradição... ao mesmo tempo q há a vontade de uma segurança romântica... a vontade de reviver períodos onde isso não existia me faz viajar e desejar começar a vida de novo
She said she didn't want to have kids because, "The are starving kids in Africa, and the world is overpopulated." So I've decided to find someone else. Placing someone else's offspring above your own doesn't make you a good person. It makes you a bad mom.
I am a very spiritual person. I belive in a after life and it gives me closure for my loved ones who have passed. I happen to also be dating a atheist. I know he doesn't belive in what I do but he dosent push his beliefs onto me. He supports me in my belief in life after death cause he knows it makes me feel better. And thats when you know you've found someone who loves you unconditionally. You both know you have your differences and you accept each other for who you two are. I love him and hes my best freind. I wouldnt trade him for anything.
my husband and i are starting an flr. i want to know how you humiliate him
I'm scared of relationships because my parents' relationship always made me feel unsafe. They argued about even smallest things - one of them first misinterpreted the other and got offended or angry, and then they both just refused to understand. It was constant, at least a few times every day. I was always on guard, fearing that a fight might break out at any time. I was also scared of expressing thoughts that conflicted theirs because I wanted to avoid possible conflicts. Now I'm scared that my own relationships will be like what I just described and that I'll never find someone I feel emotionally safe with.