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For the longest time, we flirted back and forth, and it really seemed like he was interested in me. Then I heard he started dating someone else. He stopped flirting. Recently (a few months later) it feels like he's flirting with me a bit again. He's not at all the kind of person to cheat, so I can't help but wonder if maybe they broke up and he's interested again. But I can't ask him. I don't necessarily hope they broke up, because I know his girlfriend and they make a good couple. But part of me hopes I have a chance with him. I've loved him for so long, patiently waiting for him to make a move because I didn't want to push him. And that's what I'll keep doing until I'm sure.

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  • Just ask. There is no disrespect in being direct. "Hey, are you still seeing x" is a fair question.

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I decided to finally see a therapist, it's definitely going to break the bank. But I feel lonely and anxious and I have no friends or family I can trust with my problems. And my only friend is my husband, and he can't understand what I'm feeling no matter how much I tried. I'm not going to tell him I'm going to see a therapist though.

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  • Just tell him. "I am seeing a therapist to work out some issues I'm struggling with" is fair. If he objects, you shouldn't be in a marriage with him.

  • If you can't talk to your husband about getting the help you need... he shouldn't be your husband :/ That's the exact reason I broke up with my ex boyfriend. He didn't understand my mental illness, and didn't even try. He mocked me for considering getting help and told me it was a stupid waste of time and money. You don't deserve that negativity in your life. That said, I'm so happy you're able to get help. I hope it works for you. And keep in mind if this is your first therapist, you might have to try a few different ones before you find one who can actually help you. Don't get discouraged.

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10 years ago I met my wife after internet dating for a while. I was head over heels for her and took the chance. She was willing to go all the way the first time we met, but we didn't. We were both virgins at the time. I asked her why she was willing. I was expecting some explanat about the depth of our love. She said I have good genes because I have a high GPA and look like a model. Besides if I leave, no one will ever know because I don't know any of her friends. Is this a common line of thought for women? I recall the song "Name" by Goo Goo Dolls or the line in that Lorde song about those who "Don't dance and tell." Wildest dreams by Taylor Swift. Is this kind of fling a common fantasy for women?

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  • No, she's just weird.

  • It's not. Also that's not what Wildest Dreams is about lol but I won't go into that. You've got good taste in music too ahah.

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I think I'm into some sort of love-hate feeling. I mean, I hate him that everything he did is wrong in my eyesq, but I love him so much I still put him in my priority. Honestly, I don't know.

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  • Don't waste your time on people who don't treat you right.

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I feel so bad talking about my boyfriend like this and asking for help, but if I'm hurting and feeling ignored then it should matter. My patience is running low, I card so much and love him but honestly as an adult he shouldnt have me telling him to do basic things like cleaning up or suggesting when he should shower. His father also encourages an immature, drink and maybe try some drugs type of lifestyle for "experience " as if it's going to help him achieve anything. I'm sure one day he will get around, Ive pampered him and maybe some of the things I said to him got to his head and it just feels so one-sided. even some of the things he says to me makes me feel bad... like he only did XYZ for me to "get out the friendzone", honestly I feel like a long term rebound.

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  • I've been in your situation before, and I'm just gonna tell you right now: he won't change. They never change. Get out of that relationship. You deserve better. You deserve someone who cares about you and wants to make you happy and sees eye to eye with you. Trust me, you're just wasting time with him. It's hard, but you need to cut the anchor before it drags you down with it.

  • you actually don't have responsibility over his choice. If you can't handle him, I think you should leave. I mean, there are more people out there that will help you out, not become a burden. It's just depend on how long you're willing to stay.

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I loved my boyfriend, earlier in out relation even though I was trying to overcome a lot of crap he was there and he was a lot better then, around the end of the year he was laid off and I thought maybe he would be interested in seeing me more like we talked about but I guess not, around Thanksgiving he was changing slowly and lately I feel a lack of passion from him and I feel like im losing it for him... he wants to have sex but I'm not inclined, we only started having sex recently because I was inexperienced but honestly I'm getting faint to no pleasure from him, I've told him let's try this or that and even asked what he likes, hes so prude and doesnt care to try the things I suggest and its not like I'm suggesting anything incredibly kinky either, hes quite vanilla, honestly he is starting to strike me has someone who considers himself a freak but he doesnt even last long in bed... he has such selfish tendencies and I've brought it up to him but he doesnt care, hes not even making effort to try and turn me on and if he does he just gets frustrated after about a minute or 2 and walks away :( I also feel like he doesnt see me the way I see, or maybe I should say once saw him. and yes I've tried to talk to him but if i do, he gets upset and goes silent to only fuck off somewhere instead of talking things out with me. this same general behavior occurs outside of sex as well. I just feel a bit conflicted now with our relationship and I got suggestions to talk to him and depending on how he reacts again, it shows where our relationship stands. someone even suggested I just break up with him because maybe we are just incompatible. I also dont like that I have to clean up after him like a child, telling him he needs to buy a vacuum, mop the floor, wipe down surfaces and he even sometimes "forgets" to brush his teeth. He lives with his father and I think his father is an influence to this behavior. my boyfriend also lacks priority, it's not like he doesnt have money, because he does but he would rather sit and watch it in the bank then spend it on a driver's license, car, braces, he barely ever has food in the house and lives right across from WALMART. its ridiculous and honestly I've just been thinking that since he doesnt want to listen to my suggestions on his habits I might just decide to meet someone who is overall better. and yes I've tried to talk to him about how he feels to see if hes depressed but he claims hes fine and continues to be vague and not tell me anything.

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  • Run. My husband is like that. But he worked really hard on hiding all of that while we were dating and engaged. Now it's all like that and I'm frustrated, add to that his drinking problem that he also hid from me. I feel helpless because I love him so much, but it's getting exhausting.

  • What turns you on ?

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Pseudo-Incel-Date-Guy from over half a year ago here: I just bought a bondage starter kit, because in the last few months it turned out that my girlfriend - ye gods, how I love her - loves being painfully dominated while my darkest, deepest sexual desire is to be dominating...in blind hatred against the pleasures of physical love, I denied that to such a degree that I had almost forgotten about that...It is utmost interesting to me that she is not only the love of my life, but that we, in our kinks, complement each other perfectly - better than I could have always wished for before I gave in to selfhatred. Sometimes life can be good.

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  • >Saying "ye gods" >claims to be psuedo-incel. I'll say that his story checks out.

  • Good for you :) Just remember to be safe, and always establish a safe word or a signal like a tapout in the event that one of you can't talk, and always ALWAYS follow it. Have fun!

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I'm usually a rough girl, prefer to do it rough while being tossed around with 2 or more guys. It's exciting, the sensation of being tossed around, fucked rough while he is growling like a tiger, and sucking his dick down to my throat, etc (you know what I mean). But this guy, I love him. He treat me nice, like a princess, slow and calm and soft and total opposite of what I like. It's excite me though cause it's him, still make me wet without tingles that hit your stomach. But I love him, I want him to fuck me rough and totally lose control over it.

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  • Want some side action

  • My husband is like that, and I told him that sometimes I like it rough. So sometimes we make slow sweet love, and other times he tosses me around, pulls my hair so hard while taking me from behind. Just tell him how you want it.

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I'm always asking myself, if I will lose my apetite over sex. I mean, it sex though. The straighy porn are still nice to watch and make me wet, the lesbians aren't my thing, but the gays are totally give tingles. But I do wonder if the real sex not give that much kick as the porn. I mean, it's different. The make love and the fucking. I don't know, I'm kinda like on the edge now.

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  • So what if you lose your appetite for sex? It's not that important really :/

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So, I take my purity plegde in my highschool year. Now I'm in college and I really want to have a boyfriend. But I'm afraid if he ask for sex, and I say no, and he left me. Like, is it that hard to keep a relationship away from sex for like a couple of years?

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  • Did i land in a parallel universe or something?? what the f u c k is a purity plegde?

  • I'll be real with you, if word gets around college that there is a virgin that is waiting, you will have so many serious suitors. You may get resentment from some jealous girls though. The only guys you are missing out on are the ones who just wanted a pump and dump anyway.

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