why everyone leave? why do i have to be alone once again?? god, just take me.. i can't deal with it all over again
People bore me and annoy me and yet I miss having friends. Never had a gf either btw. I'm just that bad when it comes to social interaction. When I get bored of people telling me shit that I don't care or to put me down I bottle up. It doesn't take much time to lash out at people because I'm so angry of being alone and dispised.
Music is a small comfort these days
I'm so tired of my stomach hurting and irritable bowel it stops me from doing so many things in life
I don't remember if I already posted about this, but I had a one-time climbing class two weeks ago and have been too socially anxious to go back to practice. You see, climbing with rope takes two people because one person needs to secure the other end of the rope while their partner climbs. (I did try to ask someone from the class, but the conversation kind of died because there was an awkward moment and then I was scared to speak. I have no friends either.) I didn't know this social aspect when I signed up for it, so I feel like I spent 75 euros for nothing. I'm such a noob, I should have looked into it more beforehand... Of course I could go to the place and see if some total stranger happens to need a partner, but I've been too afraid to do so.
I'd appreciate big help here... I'm 18, I'm Male, and its been a year since I have a crush on this chubby, kind and happy-go-lucky guy, who is my best friend's brother's friend... But I think he isn't gay. I think of him everyday, and I just dream to even hug him, but I can't cause I'm scared... Anyone has ideas on how I could get to just sleep with him? (Not any nudity anything just even feel him close)
It's one of those nights where it really hits me how badly I want to be loved. But I don't even know how to love someone - it has to go both ways. So it feels like a selfish wish.
I'm really frustrated with my older sister. She has a child, but tends to ignore/neglect him. I feel like he's my responsibility since I'm living in the household with them, but at times I also believe she really should care for her own child instead of having someone else do it for her.
I still miss my ex friends but they were very arrogant and mean to me. I'm no peach either but they all dispise me now mainly because I have difficulty in getting a job or doing all the things that a responsible adult does. You see, my mother has sheltered me too much from the problems life brings and now I am a disfuncional adult that's still a child mentally.
I'm tired of getting my heart broken. I'm starting to think there really just isn't anyone out there for me, and I'm just going to have to go through life alone.