Music doesn't usually make me cry. Music doesn't usually make me feel anything, it just allows me to connect and project whatever I'm already feeling. But I have just discovered a song that makes me feel something. A song that instills an emotion in me rather than reflecting what I already feel. The song "Ronan" by Taylor Swift overwhelmed me with such a tender, loving sadness that I was moved to tears. The words "You were my best four years" break my heart every single time, and the verse about standing in his closet trying to talk to him and keeping all of the clothes he would never grow into... My eyes are watering again just thinking about it. It's just such a heart-wrenching song. But it's so beautiful...
My mom was raped at 13 and had me...didn't raise me...a family member did...but told lies of a different sort even about who conceived me...as cover-up. Her hate fueled more and those around her and permeated my life with destruction....so much horror she inflicted.
I have obsessed with my own imagination and I'm living on it by talking to myself. And I think I need to start talking to my therapist about it. (eg. I'm thinking about a scenario and do it in reality)....
I need advice from any of the lesbian or bi people on here... How does one get in contact with other lesbian or bi people, I really just need someone to talk to or confide in, someone to give me advice.
I was worried she would grow feelings that would complicate out friendship if we had sex... Now here I am feeling jealous and sad knowing she's hanging out with another dude right now. What the hell, brain?
I had a nightmare that my former therapist fell into a severe depression AND developed some kind of serious physical illness. It was awful. I hope she's doing well in real life.
My period is REALLY bad randomly about two or three times a year. Tonight is one of those nights. I feel like my body is being torn in two, or like something is mauling me and ripping my guts out. I keep clenching my abs so hard trying to stop the pain that my back pops. I've already taken pain meds and I'm laying in bed with a heat pack just writhing and trying not to cry or scream. I can't feel my legs except for the stabbing pain in my knees and ankles. Why does it have to be like this?
There's this person I really like. Problem is she's my TA.. I'm not really into dating people who has an authority of me. But estimating her age, she's just a little bit older than me also in her 20's and so do I. But I need the class so I can graduate already and her time is the only time of class available for me to have so I have no choice. I just set aside the emotions but it's weird that I get quite the attraction like that for the first time. I never had an attraction to anyone before or has never been in a relationship for 5 years so it's a weird feelings. Plus I think she's straight... I mean she's a christian and no doubt she's straight. (Not that I'm generalizing cuz I'm a christian and not straight)... Plus her attitude kinda implies the same attraction towards me so.... But it kinda changed when I started annoying her a bit. She kinda started having a bit of a cold shoulder towards me and I think it's totally fine for me. She's still nice and I can see she treats everyone the same now including me. But now I can concentrate in the class and remain professional. Plus I need that class to develop my logic skills not my emotional development haha.
Why do I always fall so hard for impossible girls? It's so easy for me to get a crush on an attainable guy, but the only girls I get crushes on are either celebrities, in relationships, or straight. I've had 5 boyfriends and only one girlfriend. Why is it so hard to find girls that I can realistically date?
There was a frog in our backyard. I caught it and took it inside. But my stepdad took the frog and killed it because he said frogs are disgusting and dirty. I started crying because he didn't have to kill it. And he hit me in the mouth and told me to shut up and man up. Then he took off all my clothes except for my underwear in front of my aunt and her friends and told me to get in the bath. And I started crying harder. I think I was shaking. My aunt's friends were laughing at me. It was so bad. Today was a sad day. But at least he didn't do the other thing he usually does when he takes off my clothes. Sometimes he will do really inappropriate things when he takes off my clothes. They make me feel so bad. But he didn't do that this time. Probably because there was people over at our house and it's supposed to be a secret. He shouldn't be doing that stuff to me anymore I think. He doesn't need to take off my clothes for me like that. It would make sense if I was really young and didn't know how to do it but I'm twelve and a half now and he still does it all the time. It makes me sick.