I was that kind of guy in school who covers his test answers so the neighbor can't copy them. I didn't do this because I hate people, but because I was always so sure that what I was writing was stupid that I was too ashamed of anyone seeing it.
I am planning something like vegas buying guns is so easy here, columbine will look like a child game.
I'm finally ready to cut all ties with family. all I have to do is be patient and calm for 4 months and I will never have to contact any of them again in life because it's better to die alone for what you believe in and to better yourself than to stay around crabs in a barrel that doesn't care about the benefits of living a passionate life and actually putting in the work and patience to get there
I kinda miss my ex bff but well life goes on.
I got the money now I dont have to pretend anymore, fuck all of you.
When I still was in school, a student of my school committed suicide. Of course the principal gave a speech about it so everyone knew. I didn't know the kid, and except for his classmates, neither did anyone else. I was friends with a girl from his class and she told me that he was one of those shy kids that never talk to anyone besides 2 or 3 friends (in their 5 years of going to the same class she hadn't talked to him once and wasn't the only one). But still people were like "Derek, we miss you" (his name wasn't Derek. I have no idea what his name was) or "what a tragedy, he was so smart and talented". Nobody of the whole school cared about him when he was alive, so why pretend to care when he's dead?
I can't stand this anymore. I give up.
im going on a 5-day class filed trip next week and im getting a lot of irrational anxiety about it cause im not the most social of people nor am i used to this kind of stuff cause so far ive only been once on a class trip and it was in 8th grade and lasted 3 days and it was really fun. I seriously cant realize why im freaking out at all but i am freaking out bad, i realize its only one week and it'll pass by super fast and i'll have fun but im just freaking out cause im going to another country, 18 hours away from my own and since im still a kid every little thing is basically the end of the world for me, so i can say i see this situation from both perspectives but i still cant calm myself down. Any advice on how to finally calm down and enjoy myself instead of constantly freaking out?
HAAAAAAHAAAAAA I knew you were gay before everyone else, maybe even before you knew yourself X)
My friends got in but I didn't. Ouch.