It's soooo difficult for me to start something. Like literally my heart pounds and I get headaches. Then once I start it, I always wonder how I was able to manage to start and continue. And my work always consist fo computer work and while working my head always hurts. And everytime I use a computer, I always end up going to email, Facebook, then this, then Youtube which will then take away my whole day. I already put my phone away but I use my computer more than my phone and it's hard.
i feel like i took a leap of faith by choosing to not to go to college. but it's so hard to work on your own like this. i understand now why people go to college, but i think i still won't go.
He seemed genuinely surprised that I wanted a hug from him. He seemed so... relieved when I hugged him, like it was quenching a dying thirst. He hugged me tighter than he ever has, and for just a moment, it almost felt more like I was comforting him than casually giving him a friendly goodbye. But maybe it's all in my head.
I feel so lost with my major right now. I don't know what the heck I'm doing. I know college don't give me fortune or even stable jobs (as for my bio major). And I'm not happy to get in to med school. So I'm lost. really lost. ANd I just want to get rich honestly. Just want to focus on my income. So far I'm not in debt because I have full scholarship. only enough to pay my whole fucking tuition plus housing. But I'm lonely. Plus the major I have doesn't even introduce the specific science I want. And like what? I have to go to grad school to do that? What an actual fuck? Another money spending... And right now, I'm just way too depressed looking at my money and I only have $20 on my bank account, almost homeless and thinking how I can manage to fit that as my food allowance for three weeks. My brother, took the easiest major, and manage to double major and have excess sum of scholarship and have a stable job after. Plans to go to law school. But I don't like his majors. I took it and it was depressing even further. And his success and mines. Sometimes I look at myself, what the hell am I doing wrong? My brother told me he's always there to help me but I feel bad asking him for money. I have a job it don't even pay well. Then this other class I already failed it because I work last sem with two jobs and I'm stressed with this one either. I don't know anymore. Whatever...... I don't even know what I'm saying. All I just know I want to run far far far away where these feelings won't hunt me....
After getting caught for faking my parents signature on a bad test, my teachers asked me why. I burst into tears and told them otherwise I would have been beaten. The teachers talked to my parents that evening and the next day the teachers told me my parents said there are no other punishments I react to so there is nothing they can do about it. It was my only attempt to tell someone "offical". It still hurts after more than 15 years. And in contrast to what I say to my family, I still can't forgive my parents for beating me.
My insta feed is pure shit. i need to make it better immediately
LIFE IS NOT POWER x POWER. IT IS COMPETENCE VS COMPETENCE, BE COMPETENT.
Do you think that Folic Acid should be fortified in food worldwide? Like do you guys think it should fortified in foods like rice and starchy food? Like GMO but you're only adding rice. I'd be glad for a nice and proper answers. Thanks :)
There's this guy in the library I don't intend to fat shame but he's fat and literally took four chairs and even took the chair where my bag was without even saying anything. And he just uses the chairs where his feet will be on. The first thing that turned me off is that he was eating very very loud. Picks his nose and flicks it. And he's talking loud. When he removed his shoes, it was horribly stinky that even other people left the room just because his feet really stinks. And it looks like he's in his house or something. It's so gross. The very top of the library is usually the most quiet and secluded area.but His feet's odor went all over the room and its so bad!!! You'll get dizzy!So yeah I just left and will never go back and I assume he will always be there. But what's weird though, I always wonder how his girlfriend handle it. Like he keeps even asking his gf for food like she's his maid. The guy was like," food? Tissue? Open the movies for me, Where's my spring rolls. etc." But they're happy and the girl looks innocent... Just sharing....
I do really wanna know how to love philosophy and write philosophical stufs and memorize philosopher's quotes!! but howwww